Edu might finally be cooking something he plans to sell - he has the wax paper ready, Uber Eats orders are rolling in, and he’s shifting some of our goods at discount rates to show the world we are open for some tasty business.
First on the grill:
Nuno Tavares
The dog-kisser-in-chief has had a rough couple of seasons since breaking onto the scene with some of the maddest football we’ve ever seen under Arteta. The main attribute this lunatic has, outside his love for four-legged friends, is his unreal sprints. Nuno can move; he is not in control of his body, but he’s a threat all the same. If someone can coach a bit of sense into his game, he might have a career as grand as Adama Traoré. Lazio want a piece and are willing to go to £8m to get their man.
Eddie Nketiah
Marseille has been in the news because they’re apparently prepared to hold their nose and sign a player who is very clearly a nasty abuser of women. It shouldn’t shock anyone they’re prepared to go there… nor that he was the only club interested. Everyone deserves a second chance in life; I’m just not sure that the second chance should be in elite-level sport.
Anyway, Eddie has piqued their interest as well. Marseille absolutely knows he’d bang in 30 goals a season in a league that is less physical than the Premier League. The guy needs confidence, some love, and an arm around the shoulder. They’re willing to drop £32m on him. That’s great money, and I think the match of clubs on paper works for me.
Sambi Lokonga
Sambi has nearly tied up a deal with Sevilla. The deal is apparently a season loan with an option to buy at £12m. It also comes with a 25% sell-on clause if those pesky Spaniards flip him to Chelsea a year later for £100m.
People, that’s £46m in fees we could have made by the end of the week. Add in that £12m for next season, and we’re cooking at £58m.
Reiss Nelson
That West Ham insider guy reckons West Ham is getting a bit frisky over Reiss Nelson. I don’t really care what the transfer fee is - I suspect around £20m if we’re really lucky. But honestly, on his salary, I’d take anything. Interesting that Brighton has also raised their hands - maybe I am underestimating his profile, but I don’t care.
Youth Moves
Amario Cozier-Duberry has moved to Brighton on a free transfer, and Ruell Walters has jumped to Luton. I’ve seen some bits that say there could be some compensation due to the club for paying for his education. Either way, it’s a good move for both of them. They’ll get faster development because minutes will flow more freely, and maybe they can make the jump to bigger clubs if they can hit their potential. I’m really interested in how these two do - clearly rated by the club, but not good enough for the now. Are we about to see a couple of players that might make us feel sad in 3 years' time? Maybe.
Potential Incoming
How about players coming in? Not much going on here. We are apparently chasing down an English 18-year-old keeper, Tommy Setford, who plays for Ajax.
I’ve been following this guy's career for about 12 minutes, and I like the cut of his jib.
There’s not a lot to read about him, but he’s basically a Dutch boy who was strong-armed by his dad into choosing the right nation.
"It’s a great honor to play for England. It’s the land my father’s from, so I play for him a little. But they appreciate me in England: the coaches and goalkeeper coaches are happy with how I do things. Not only are the U17 coaches happy with me, but the U21 coaches and the first team see that I perform well in England. They see a lot of potential in me.”
He must be feeling pretty grand right now. He’s been with Ajax since he was 7 years old, he has two brothers in the same academy, and he wants a piece of The Arsenal. What’s not to love?
Right, that’s all I have time for today. We dropped a Thursday Therapy early bird yesterday; check your usual podcast services if you want to listen to it for free this morning. Have yourself a lovely day.
"Donald duck!"
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Sir Gareth Southgate, the Duke of Euro 2024, Knight Grand cross, Fellow of Royal Society.