Patrice Evra trolls Arsenal like it was 2009

by & filed under News Review.


We’ve gone full cycle people. We have a new set of babies. Granit Xhaka is out there showing more fight in the papers than on the pitch.

“We have to stop about mental [strength] bulls*** like this. For me, it is the same whether you play home or away – you have to win and show big character and a good game and not to always find the same excuse.”


To be fair to Granit, I find it a touch implausible that any pundit is talking about mental strength at Arsenal this season. David Luiz sits at the heart of our defence, his trophy cabinet wasn’t the byproduct of a weak mind. I think the more likely cause of our meekness is the lack of a clear and concise plan. As Aash said on the podcast, we’ve lost 4 out of 7 against newly-promoted teams. I think the players go into all games not understanding the brief, but against better teams, they raise their levels because it’s more interesting. Alternatively, better teams play into our negative approach more easily. The big teams come at us, the little teams don’t fall for the nonsense.

Confusing times. Not as confusing as cracking the enigma code of an Unai Emery prezzer.

“Each match is important to use different players. Tomorrow for the players, the team and me, this game is going to be important for us.”

“We need a lot of players and to use different players to achieve the best performance. We can make some changes for the Premier League and Europa League.”

Yes, yes. Tomorrow there will be different players.

The great bonus for Emery is the pub games he picks up in the front half of the season. It stops the accumulation of negative fan energy from reaching AIRPLANE BANNER levels of retribution. We play badly in the league every week, then we play a shite Europa team with the kids and win 9-0, the fans forget the bitter taste of weekend football, then we play badly and CURSE that we can’t play like we’re beating a pub team every week.

This following comment is quite special.

“We lost a very big opportunity in the Premier League to finish third in the table. We are five and have chances on Sunday. We have to get better but it’s one process.

“Our strategy is – when I was watching in my office – we changed 10 players. 40 per cent more or less. We are using new players, above all also some young players to give them chances more quickly.

“The most important is the club and team. Our objective is clear on where we want to get. I am very confident in the players, in our job, in our work, in the club strategy and in our way.”

I like that there’s a strategy, though I’m not sure what the content of the said strategy is. But there is one.

I am looking forward to playing Vitoria. It’s a good chance for the fans to lose themselves in a faux reality of Arsenal greatness. It’s a good chance for the first team to inject some confidence into their legs.

See what I did there?

Play Pepe tomorrow night. The man needs an open play goal. Give Torreira and Ozil a run-out.  Let’s see Holding, Bellerin and Tierney on the pitch. Those three should have played on Monday, been rested tonight, then played at the weekend. I’m sure there was a super strategic reason behind that, it might even be in the cut/pasted paragraph above, we can’t be sure.

Let’s have a BIG game.

I’ll leave you on this thrilling quote from the big man.

“Our response could be better. But good attitude, good mentality.”

I agree.

Let’s have a massive one, but before you leave, listen to my fucking podcast. It has good sound, some great chat, and some absolutely electric banter. Kind of. I mean. Maybe.




Cold Monday night up north, are we ready?!

by & filed under News Review.

Been working on this new diet called ‘gym and starve yourself’… you know what, very effective at dropping weight, but you actually can’t control where the weight comes off. That’s the next phase, then I’m bringing it to market. I’ll call it G&SY, remember the brand.

BIG GAME tonight. We have the chance to make up some of that lost ground on Liverpool after they dropped points to United yesterday. We also have the chance to move further ahead of the disaster down the road. They really did make Watford look good at times.