Sifting through the dark noise

by & filed under News Review.

I went to TJ Maxx yesterday, to shop for a fancy dress outfit. My word, one of the worst experiences of my life. Stacks and stacks of clothes pilled up on racks that go on forever like some sort of nightmare… then, out of the blue, I accidentally found something I liked at a very good price. Now, I am a TJ Maxx shopper and I have to live with that shame.

Reading around some of the news outlets, you’d think Arsenal were raiding the rails at TK Maxx. No rhyme or reason to what they’ll pick off the shelf, as long as it’s warm and has a loose connection to the Premier League.

Things to note: For a lot of the drab names we’re being linked to, just being mentioned in the same breath as Arsenal is the win.

Everton have an open job, West Ham might in a few weeks, if there’s a chance they can up their leverage and reputation, they’ll take it.

Kovac, Martinez and Marcelino are all Everton level managers, but given then chance they’d take the huge opportunity on show at Arsenal.

I just hope that doesn’t happen.

The names that I care about are Pochettino or Arteta (knowing the Brendan is off the table).

The exSpurs man would be the ideal candidate. Young, burned by Levy, and at the very top of his game. He would be incredible. I just struggle to see him being interested in our project. No money, a huge mess, and a salary a few bands below what he’d want. You can never rule it out, but I think we are going to shoot lower.

Mikael Arteta is the great unknown. A lot of people are writing about the influence he has at City. He runs most of the training sessions, he’s a true innovator, and he has the electricity that could jump start the post-Wenger rebirth. I think he could be a sensational move. A visionary hire that would be about the future. A coach that could ensure we don’t piss away the youth talent we have. Someone that could bring the sort of the football to the club that wakes you up at 3am before a game.

Like a fart in a small meeting room, anyone else is just noise. Kovac, in the fucking bin. Marcelino, not for me. Martinez, stab my eyes out with chip fork. We have to be serious about the future with the next hire.

Good football. Elite grasp of our culture. The ability to command the attention of a squad with a vision. An ego that will stomach a 3 year rebuild.

I do not want someone at the club that Raul met in a club in Barcelona in 2013. I don’t care if Edu played guitar with someone at a house party in Sau Paulo in the 80s. I want someone right for the job.

Tonight we play West Ham. Freddie really needs a win. The players need to pull something out the bag for him. It was interesting to read that he has chosen to play the senior players because he doesn’t want to crush the kids. Very noble of him, but it’s not doing him any favours. West Ham have been in a mess tonight, lose this evening, and we are in a relegation battle before the worst month in the calendar.

Fear not though, it’s bad, but once they sort the managerial mess, we’ll claw our way back up the table. It’s probably better for the next manager if we finish 8th this season. No Europa next season, more time to coach, more time to rest players.

Before I go, I thought the below video from Souness about homophobia in the game was something else. The ultimate alpha male from yesteryear where they drank toxic masculinity for each of their three meals and thought woke culture was dropping your balls on the face of a teammate to see how long it’d take for them to wake up, now talking about his views on the state of the LGBTQ scene in the Premier League. Magic.

Anyone that confronts their own ignorance and learns about a community alien to them is a top fucking bloke. Love that he went to Brighton Pride to get informed. Apparently good mates with the late Dale Winton. Big names like that speaking up is what the game needs. Who cares who you fuck, unless it’s another teammates wife.

Right, see you in the comments my qweeeens. x

P.S. Check out my new favourite Youtuber, Stat Man Dave and his thoughts on how Arteta might set the team.

1,108 Responses to “Sifting through the dark noise”

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  1. China1

    If xhaka really is our best midfield then deary fucking me burn it all down, sell the lot and start again because xhaka is a pretty terrible footballer

  2. Just Another Customer

    watch The Boy From Croydon tear it up against Substandard Liege in The Loosers Cup

    Ljungberg slowly introducing the Young Guns now trying to ease them into the starting lineup

    Reiss Nelson will be running down from the right too

    only my worry is Saka who somehow can’t get into the game at all even with the precious minutes he had

    maybe Willock can link up well with the Academy alumni

  3. Guns of SF

    Saka still too young and needs more strength
    Sub is ok for him right now…
    Pepe might have kicked started his career with this… screamer goal!

    Of course Martinelli was awesome… we finally have width in attack – makes life easier this way

  4. Just Another Customer

    I wouldn’t worry much about Tierney – a young sprightly Scottish lad with tremendous calf index fit to run the flank all day to deliver scrumptious accurate crosses all day all night

    couple that with his on and off field chemistry with Gabby and our left flank is settled for the time being

    only worry right now is to find his equivalent on the other flank

    the weed-laden lackadasaical AMN is not a proper RB that’s fo sho

  5. Aussie Gooner

    I don’t think we should get too carried away with this performance. It is a huge relief to win but for the first 60 minutes we were crap. Passes to nowhere, pulling out of tackles, turning the back to the ball (ie West Ham goal) etc. Not acceptable at any level. West Ham could have been 2-0 up at half time. I nearly gave up and went to bed (5am ). Playing Pepe and Martinelli from the start was the right thing to do – they cause havoc for the defence which is what we have been lacking for so long. Still too many passengers in the team – we need a rebuild not just a re-boot!

  6. Just Another Customer

    it’s a record breaking away win a confidence booster so
    I for one want to take as much positives as possible mainly from the performances of our new signings

    I feel for you though OZ lad you from Perth?

    that first half must have put you to sleep already

    I would have if didn’t have a cheeky nap beforehand

  7. China1

    Smith Rowe is talented and technical but very slight of frame

    PL opposition will smell blood and bully him until he bulks up

  8. Aussie Gooner


    Born and Bred in London but now live in WA about 450 km North of Perth. I work night shifts so I am used to the night matches! Just as well with these made for TV schedules!

    Second half made it all worthwhile! I have always believed in the quality of Martinelli and Pepe – form is temporary class is permanent!

  9. China1

    Neither bellerin nor amn are good defenders

    Tho I think midfield is our biggest problem

    If you don’t have a good midfield the attack will struggle and the defense will be exposed as we have been seeing every match this season

    Our defense sucks but could be 10% better with better organization and selection and a further 10% better if well protected by the midfield

    That 20% improvement would turn our defense from outright shambles to passable but still plenty of room for improvement

    But I really don’t know who we should be putting out in midfield…

    Torreira guen as DMs and someone who isn’t ozil and is willing to put a shift in as AM imo. It would still be heavily flawed but a little less disgraceful would be a start

  10. Aussie Gooner

    China 1

    As with Pepe and Martinelli, I believe that Smith Rowe has the class to succeed. Not sure about Willock, Saka, AMN, Nelson etc. I think they may need to go out on loan to get more exposure and experience. Torreira is also a keeper when played in his favoured position. Tierney will come good as well.

  11. Just Another Customer

    same problem with Guen thought he would bulked up by now

    as always it’s irritating how he always invite fouls to himself risking injuries

    even more sad when he dive and grab the ball looks so pathetic and effeminate

    even then if he increase his physical stature especially his calf index even if he holds up the ball the opponent won’t make a budge thus adding another dimension to his ability

    (someone might be sick of this calf index meme now sorry I won’t exhaust/overdo it)

    well good for you Aussie Gooner that’s still some dedication hopefully we get into CL soon to keep you awake in the early morning

  12. Aussie Gooner

    AFTV is not responsible for our demise! It is the owners, executive, management and players that are responsible! If you don’t like it, don’t watch it! Besides there is more than enough negativity on here to satiate you!

  13. Just Another Customer

    haha yeah le grove make constructive criticism cool since 2007 with spicy ranting and negativity on the side

    though sometimes it’s too repetitive and toxic that even a hardened vet like me can’t take it and have to take a break from it just to stay sane

    but then again it’s the reflection of the club as a whole as years gone by

    hopefully better years ahead of us

  14. Tony

    Seems the common consensus on LG from the match is that Xhaka and Ozil were useless and in Xhaka’s case the more cowardly of the two. Carraghar was spot on with his appraisal of Xhaka ducking his head for the goal.

    Ozil as lazy as ever making sure he marked spaces between West Ham players so he didn’t have to make a tackle.

    Just pure lazy cowardliness from both Xhaka and Ozil. Xhaka could track back a tortoise.

    Both should be first on the list to be sold by the club.

    Has Xhaka got concussion? If he has Freddie can leave Xhaka out of the selection process without any pressure from the suits to play him.

    I just can’t see any reason to play Xhaka and Ozil unless under pressure from above to play them – probably for the shop window, but that doesn’t seem to be working does it?

    3 goals and no assists from Ozil – in fact nothing from Ozil.

    Same shit just different day for Ozil then.

  15. Tony

    From player ratings – enough said!

    Mesut Ozil – 6

    So much ability but lets himself down with a lack of effort. Coasted through another game

    Granit Xhaka – 5.5

    Gave away possession time and again. Arsenal will listen to offers for the Swiss next month. No wonder.

  16. Sid

    The minimum in the winter tranfer should be 1 beast CM sangare/zakaria. Dozi to play in ozils position, torreira DM, new guy box to box.

  17. Nelson

    – Torr played one of his best game for Arsenal. He kept his position well and was very effective both in defense and attack.
    – Guen is much more dynamic than Xhaka.
    – We have discovered a good combination. When we don’t have the ball, Martinelli can do the back tracking and tackle for Ozil. When we have the ball, Ozil can do the link up play from midfield to attack. Our game suddenly became fluid after we scored the first goal. Ozil was involved in the build up of the last two goals.

  18. SP

    The Ozil problem cannot be solved. We either need to terminate his contract and pay off the remainder of his amount or keep him for one more year and let him off for free.

  19. gnarleygeorge9

    Some Gunners fans need to learn to keep their powder dry, in particular the ones’ who only go back as far as Arsene Wenger LOL

  20. Tony

    You lost me when you said, “When we have the ball, Ozil can do the link up play from midfield to attack”.

    Ozil is a liability period and needs to be sold – problem is we can’t give the waster away.

    Probably not even MLS or China quality these days.

  21. Emiratesstroller

    We can criticise “ad infinitum” both Ozil and Xhaka, but the reality is they are the only two midfield players on our books with an element of “experience”.

    Both Torreira and Ceballos are aged over 23, but realistically have very limited game time in EPL or for that matter in top division football elsewhere.

    That has been a major problem for the club in the club over the past two seasons.

    Players like Willock, Guendouzi, Saka and Smith-Rowe are all aged 18-20 and
    lack physicality and experience. That has shown throughout season and explains why we have been too easily overrun this season.

    So whatever posters may think Xhaka and Ozil need to be playing particularly
    when we have a schedule of three games in six days as we have got with West
    Ham, Standard Liege and Manchester City.

  22. Wasi

    Aussie gooner
    Same here i thought of going to sleep after half time (2:15 am). But for some or the other reason I didn’t and it was worth it.

  23. Bojangles


    You up around Geraldton? Or maybe Meckering?


    I had to check your name on your post, thought I’d made a mistake and was reading a CG post with all that calf index talk.

  24. Gentlebris

    ‘If we can put in a good performance on Thursday to get the momentum and confidence going then I see no reason why we can’t get a win against City this Sunday.’

    If I could show that I know how to wear a crown then I see no reason why I can’t be king of England.

  25. Claver

    Fools, idiots, shit, utter garbage, stupid, useless, rubbish…

    Not the kind of language you’ll run into often among decent folk. Definitely Not a way any of us would like to be described. Yet these words are thrown around on here with abandon.

    “A pile of excrement”

    I mean, Damn!

  26. Samesong

    Champagne charlieDecember 9, 2019 22:15:12
    Rafa unpacking body shape, feet position, angles of knees when defenders are facing attackers. That’s the level of attention needed at the club from the ground

    He looked the the Titanic turning. 😆 but I loved his analysis.

  27. Gentlebris

    ‘Not the kind of language you’ll run into often among decent folk. Definitely Not a way any of us would like to be described. Yet these words are thrown around on here with abandon.’

    It’s no big deal, believe me.
    Every decent man has a place where he behaves a little indecent.

    I could throw one or two here but outside of here I’m as proper as tax. It’s high luxury to get a space where you can shoot off your shit.

  28. Just Another Customer

    as an actual OG poster of the blog (what happened to that splinter blog by the way can’t find it anywere now?) what did you mean by that gg9?

    I’m aware of how fickle I am but I am just what my namesake suggest

    after all where else on the internet that you can have deep insight of all things Arsenal with foul mouthed banters all around (anymore)?

    and as active and lively as this too?

    being polite and dry is not what the interwebz is all about innit it used to be where the kool 1337 haxxor kidz used to spend time on

    okay I’m just on mid-late-90s-early-00s nostalgia trip naow

  29. Globalgunner

    Replace Xhaka with Arturo Vidal who is currently not getting any game at Barca and see a major step up in our midfield. Guen would also have someone to learn from

  30. Valentin

    Sell Xhaka for €30 millions and Elneny for €20 millions and buy Thomas Partey for €50 millions. That would solve a lot of our midfield issue.

  31. vickingz

    @ global gunner, you mean arturo vidal who’s always venturing forward as if he’s suarez? No positional discipline since he got to barca, ain’t the kinda player we need. We need someone who can increase the tempo of our ball movement to our attackers. We are not really complete but with our pacy and ever working front three, we should be doing better. Our midfielders especially zhaka and ozil are too slow to transit balls, they allow our opponents settle down before giving balls to our attackers. Take out ozil and xhaka would have been the right thing but who do we have to fill in? I’d prefer ESR to ozil and a grounded willock like valverde to xhaka but ……..

  32. Ishola70

    “Sell Xhaka for €30 millions and Elneny for €20 millions and buy Thomas Partey for €50 millions. That would solve a lot of our midfield issue.”

    What do you think of Zakaria? I can see that fans would like his physical aspect but the boy looks loose in his play off the ball a few too many times. We need a disciplined CM and I don’t think Zakaria fits that bill.

    I’d be a bit wary of the old boys as well like Vidal.

    The only old boy I’d be interested in is Axel Witsel from Borussia Dortmund. Shame that the years are creeping up on him now because he would be a good option.

  33. guest man aka WW

    sell xhaka for £30 million????? is that a joke?….£5million tops…..Elneny???? could you give him away???
    jeez….now one man we have to keep is martinelli…
    i will be surprised if we manage to keep him till the end of next season…by then he would have scored 30 goals,,,man utd will demand him…kroenke wil cream over £50 million in his sky……all over…

  34. Tony

    Rafa setting his leverage position or really is happy in China?

    “‘No chance I come back now’: Rafa Benitez dismisses return to the Premier League with West Ham or Arsenal and commits immediate future to China

    Rafa Benitez has ruled out talk of an imminent return to the Premier League

    The Spaniard has been linked with taking charge of Arsenal and West Ham
    He insists he is committed to the two-year deal he signed with Dalian Yifang

  35. guest man aka WW

    Avoid relegation…sell auba for £70million to real madrid…….get this upoemenaco…..centre back…get debryne..(assuming arteta brings him). shelvey in the engine room and proper tackler..sell off the loafers…..get in the fighters….
    oh am i dreaming?