Captain quandary + Guess who is sick?

by .

via @Arsenal.com

Our first Saturday match of the season has landed and it feels good. Enjoy it, they’re going to be few and far between.

So what’s new?

Ozil has been ‘sick’ again, lolz, there are people that have eaten directly from a nuclear reactor with stronger immune strength than him.

Arsenal ditched the captain’s notes. Xhaka is the ‘Voice from the dressing room’ in the matchday programme… it’s like Arsenal is in its early twenties at a fancy University, we’ve just met an older student that’s running side classes in wokeness called Kale-isthenics, and we’ve just learned that the captain’s armband is actually social construct and is basically a form of oppression.

Emery hates it. He can’t wait to tell the captains of other clubs that they’re contributing a vicious cycle of captain-archy that’s directly contributing the anxiety of naturally weak people.

Good for Unai, but I can’t help but think a team that really lacked leadership when the chips were down last season should perhaps be making one person accountable for being the go-to for dishing out meaty bollockings.

Checklist for the captain:

  • Make sure they’re not injured
  • Make sure they’re going to play the majority of games
  • Make sure the fans and players like them
  • Make sure they are good at football
  • Make sure they can battle knife crime with their BARE HANDS

Probably going to be Xhaka… guy can handle the spare key though, so who am I to sniff?

Burnley at home shouldn’t be a problem, but if we play like we did against Newcastle it might be.

They’re capable of putting the wind up us and they have some speed in their ranks… Ashley Barnes can be a bother at times and I hate playing shit-kickers with an unsettled starting 11.

Our defence put on a great show against Newcastle, our full-backs played with more discipline, which looked like a tactical decision based on ability. It’ll be interesting to see whether that holds up tomorrow. I’m also waiting to see how Emery treats Chambers now David Luiz has been with us a couple of weeks. We are one week from Liverpool, Luiz making his debut against them is a scary proposition… so is Chambers starting against Firmino, Mane or the ruthless Origi.

We need a big performance, lots of energy, lots of chances and a bit of a statement.

OVER TO YOU UNAI!

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Dissenter

We may be making Ceballos more expensive for us to afford next summer.
He’s getting a nice place on the English transfer market window, enough to trigger a brutal bidding war.
Hopefully we still get a gentleman’s first refusal from Madrid.

WengerEagle

You’ve been banging on about Ceballos not being silky all day Ishola, who are you arguing with at this point?

Ishola70

Liverpool had to fight for that result in the end.

WengerEagle

Charlie

Yep, the really top players generally can adapt to most clubs/environments but the more mid tier seem to thrive for a certain club or manager and flounder elsewhere. Or a country.

Ciro Immobile wasn’t good in Spain or Germany but he’s been great in Italy.

Champagne charlie

Bernard was a miss on a bosman, busy little player and would’ve done well on the wing for us here.

Especially when you consider they’ve bought Iwobi for 35 mil.

Freddie Ljungberg

RH Think you’re being harsh on Torreira, he isn’t fully fit yet and didn’t have a full preseason. Sure, he faded second half of the season last year but that was to be expected really, coming from Serie A, world cup etc. He was one of if not the best player first half of the season. Much better player than Xhaka in all respects. Him being short wasn’t really much of a problem until he ran out of steam. Agree that we need more physicality in midfield though but would sell Xhaka over Torreira any day, any time and bring… Read more »

WengerEagle

Ugly win for Pool but that’s why they’ll be right up there again with City.

Time and time again pull out the 3 points in those scenarios.

TR7

Ceballos is silky. Ishola as always too hung up on defensive game of players including that of forward players.

Champagne charlie

Weagle

Yea there’s that 1% who do it wherever they play, although some elites have a soft head on them and don’t hack some places.

As you say it’s the next band down, the really good players, that need the right club to really perform.

Marko

Lol it’s not wrong though you plum, he is sloppy in possession at certain points in matches like he was today in one of his so called good matches. Which IS what I said in fact.

Say I say to you here there’s this lad he misplaces passes at a fairly common rate but his pass success rate is 89% you’d think that doesn’t sound right does it. Right?

Ishola70

WE

“You’ve been banging on about Ceballos not being silky all day Ishola, who are you arguing with at this point?”

Not really WE.

Just answering Legend Max who seems to think silkiness is essential lol.

And Paulinho earlier who wanted a bit of silky acknowledged as well.

As you are implying who cares really.

As long as he is an influence down the line like he was today “silkiness” irrevelant.

Leftsidesanch

New post btw

Ishola70

TR7 another that must have silky lol

Silkiness essential.

Freddie Ljungberg

King of the cloggers goes on an almighty rant against diving and cheating after the game:

https://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/sean-dyche-full-transcript-burnley-18953478

WengerEagle

Charlie I have never been Ibrahimovic’s biggest fan and I only mean in terms of not rating him as the best CF of his generation like so many seem to fantastic player that he has been but he’s probably as elite a nomad as one gets. Won the league with nearly club he played with in Europe and that spans Italy, Holland, Spain and France. Scored 28 goals even for United as a pensioner and he dicks the MLS when he’s in the mood, scored a hat-rick vs LA FC who along with Vela were being hyped as better than… Read more »

bob

letting go the overrated Ramsay wont so crazy after all.

TR7

New post

WengerEagle

Marko Haha you know well that I meant it’s a common feature of his game to misplace a pass in a dangerous area rather than misplace passes in general as most of his passes are short ones in the middle of the park without any significant risk behind them being underhit/misplaced. It’s like you saying that Xhaka’s a mistake machine or that AMN is shit defensively. You don’t literally mean that he makes mistakes all the time or that AMN is crap in every instance of play off the ball defending but it’s a fair point because they are obvious… Read more »

Carts

“Pukki going to be fantasy football goldust, this years Michu”

supply teacher looking fucker will probably pull a Kevin Phillips this season

KushDgunner

City and Spurs scores

Un na naai

Spurs could have won this

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