Wow, wow, wow… Raul S has pulled off the shock signing of the summer, with Dave Ornstein announcing the Spaniard has reeled in one of the best talents in Ligue 1 with Nicolas Pépé.
I am SHOOK.
Pepe to Arsenal. Hahahahah
— Le Grove (@LeGrove) July 13, 2019
The above tweet is obviously a massive L on my part, but there are layers to my unprophetic words. Firstly, the fact we’ve managed to scrabble together €80m for a player is quite incredible. If there were a saying from this summer it’d be…
‘It’s all about the instalment plan, fam’
Secondly, I am HUGELY surprised that we were the only major club outside Napoli in for his talents. I know I have repeatedly defended what Arsenal is to players and managers around the world, but I didn’t think we were in that league of intrigue for names that had clubs like Paris and Liverpool sniffing. Just goes to show you, London is a huge pull, the full stadium is unique, the training ground is special, the chance to play must also be important, and the new guys must be able to sell a dream.
What a moment, I can’t remember Arsenal dropping a signing this major since we brought in Thierry Henry. He’s the right-winger of our dreams. The most exciting Ivorian since Yaya Toure stepped foot in Boreham Wood (Jokes Kolo, jokes). He scored 23 goals last season and gave 12 assists. He’s been making a contribution to Lille every 101 minutes, which is far more impressive than what Zaha has been doing at Palace over the past season. The best he’s mustered is a contribution every 152 in his best ever year last season.
The player himself is a joy to watch, for some reason I spent a lot of time watching Ligue 1 last year and he’s been one of the stand out guys. He’s powerfully built, standing at 6ft. I think he’s slightly lighter in frame than Zaha, but he’s electric on the ball. He has deft feet, he moves at pace, he’ll come deep, he’ll stretch teams and in front of goal last season he blew up.
We’ve struggled for years to add players with athleticism to our frontline, it’s great to see we’re finally moving in on players that are a huge issue for teams on the counter. When you have a shite defence like we do, the last thing we need is to be pressed into our own half because the only person chasing a long ball is Auba (who can be crowded out physically in big games).
Outside that, this has been a fucking great signing for the fans. This is a premium signing. I really think Zaha would have been good for us, but that could have gone the way of Welbeck, or it could have just been a move that was ok.
Pepe has a higher ceiling than Zaha, I think he’s better technically, and he’s 2 years younger. Our guy has resale value as well, which is super important when you look how we’re going to have to work the ins and outs moving forward.
It’ll also be good for the squad morale. No one wants to go back to preseason and have no new faces to look at. This will add the squad vibes and it’ll be just as fun for the players as it has been for the fans.
I know that a few of journos are saying the move favoured us because we were willing to give his agency team the commissions they wanted. It seems like the cost of football these days, but it’s dodgy all the same. We’ve lost out on lots of big names in the past because we’ve ignored the dark arts of the game, and now it looks like that’s where we’re playing them… but like most things in sport, you cease to care if you have a shiny new player rolling out in a redshirt.
I did think it was quite amusing that Raul and the exec leadership team spent an afternoon getting pounded at the fan Q&A for basically no reason… they could have just said we’d be signing Pepe this week and everyone would have shut the fuck up. It’s a bit like chewing out your partner for not doing anything for your birthday, then packing up your bags and leaving them, only find out their last-ditch attempt to meet you was a surprise birthday party with the Rolling Stones.
What I find particularly handsome about this summer is that the roof of the house has blown off and we’re out the front painting with a really nice Farrow and Ball shade of gray. Where are the defenders?!
Are we Kevin Keegan’s Newcastle? It’s looking that way… but hey, at least the players are exciting.
See you in the comments!
Eagle
My uncle is die hard Celtic
He reckons If you let Celtic and rangers into the prem they’d win it within 6 years. Seriously
Scots are proud and tribal to the point of delirium
Unn
They have a huge following over here with religion/culture a central part of it, first jersey that was ever bought for me was from a relative age of 2/3 and was a Larsson 7 Celtic shirt.
He was far too class an act for the SPL.
They are I’d hazard a guess the 3rd most followed club over here after Man United and Liverpool.
I give you a big topic to talk about. How about mustafi being our best player next season?
Jay
Go on son, elaborate on that.Can’t just call us a wanker and not give any reasoning.
Eagle
He did put them away
Did he not score vs Bayern and Fiorentina?
I think he’s got better positional sense than either. Better instinct.
Jay,
Can I have you just smoke?
It is just terrifying and exhilarating at the same time.
Imagine Mustafi betting Maldini’s brain a la Freaky Friday style.
On the other hand that could also mean that the team is so shit that Mustafi become our best player.
Jay
Come on. This is a football blog not sexual fanstasy forum.
Jay and HL must be on day 3 of their joint bender
Where is Mavro everyone?
Typical hiding from him
It’s remarkable he is so elusive
Anyone ever watched Legion? It’s really good. Very abstract and dark psychology. The action takes place in the form of dance or other alternative mediums
Sf
We sent him back after bojo and brexit. He doesn’t meet the new points based criteria
Mustafi next.
Unnmai
Give me the real reason
When Larsson was at Celtic it was a proper Rangers and Celtic, Scottish football killed itself with the all out war against Rangers leading up to the administration.
Some unreal footballers back then, the league is absolute mince these days.
https://www.mylondon.news/news/south-london-news/south-london-thug-who-punched-16636586
Increased funding doesn’t matter when judges are namby pamby wet lettuces.
They keep letting these animals do whatever they like
Same with stop and search
Same with the no helmet no persuit rule.
Still
Diversity is our strength
Sf
Don’t think emery rates him
He looked great in the few games in which wenger deployed him before he left and he’s never looked like it again.
I don’t understand how so many defenders start off looking like the Berlin Wall when they first play and then arsenal happens to them and they leave with PTSD
Can we not hire in a specialised defence coach?
I was at the game with my kid and dad who I can’t take to proper games
Xhaka and Miki are shocking
Wilock was better when he played deeper in the second half
Nketiah was wasteful but got in great positions
Reis Nelson should start he has skills and is very direct
Yeah prime Stiliyan Petrov could ball too.
Divorsity ist gut!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzNdMr1Rm9Q&
That Carmen Ejogo is an unbelievably flawlessly beautiful woman. 45. Just wow.
Unaai
That’s the very reason I was all for a manager that would challenge that ethos of defensive abandonment. Wenger was interested only in attack, and now Emery.
The club would be in a better place if we understood our ills and worked against that. Seem to just double down on our good bits which is a bit puzzling.
Something hot about Thandie newton too.
Larsson was an amazing player really, even at the age of 35 after suffering a nasty broken leg earlier in his career and an ACL in his first few months at Barcelona he came on to make the all-important impact in the CL Final against us with those 2 late assists. Scored 15 goals that season too largely playing wide.
Let Celtic revel in the glory of an ex player scoring against us in a friendly
I mean this is a team that plays in a pub league with such esteemed opposition as Kilmarnoch and spartack thistle. I’m sure I spelt those wrong but pub teams need not be spelt right
CG How are you my friend? I’m with you on this( Nah, not really). Losing today is no big deal. Shite, we won the Emirates Cup so many times over the years under Wenger, some fans actually considered it a major trophy. You know who I’m talking about. Wenger has gone but he still lives on in the hearts of those that constantly belittle Emery, even though he (AW)is now sitting at home, hiding away, in the realisation that he fcuked things up big time. Of course he is. You see CG, your incessant ranting is not only boring and… Read more »
Weagle
Brian Laudrup was my fave player to watch, was brilliant. But Rangers had some players for a time there and were some sidebar Andy Goram in goals, Artur Newman, Amoruso was a head case, Jorg Albertz, Laudrup, Michael Mols pre-injury was special.
*some side
China
“”””I mean this is a team that plays in a pub league with such esteemed opposition as Kilmarnoch and spartack “””””
Yep- And we are buying their injured left back for £30 000 000
Could not make it up.
How can he be worth 3 times as much as Delph ????..
Or £10 million cheaper than Trippier?.
Who are both rarely injured and are PROVEN in this league.
Fail to Prepare
Prepare to Fail.
Charlie The Laudrup brothers were before my time but I was blown away reading quotes on Michael especially, received the highest praise a player can get from Guardiola, Romario, Iniesta, Cruyff, Platini, Beckenbauer, Raul, Messi, Figo, Capello, Stoichkov. Surprised that you don’t hear more about him when people are discussing the greatest players of their eras. Sounds as if he was the best player in the late 80’s/ 90’s before the emergence of Ronaldo. Common theme with the Laudrup brothers from reading about them is that they had more ability than anyone but were mentally more fragile than other top… Read more »
Don’t forget about the Scottish players we had in our league
Hendry, McAllister, Gallagher at Blackburn. Brian McLair at United
Preferred Henrik over Laudrup myself though.
Gazza was quality at rangers too
Cc
You forgot Giovanni VB and arteta
They had a young gattuso too
Gattuso cut his teeth in the SPL for Rangers too at age 18/19.
He was a hard bastard, they don’t make them like him anymore.
Suga funny video and on the mark, almost like a mini South Park episode
Weagle
Same with me, my dads just a big blue nose so that era was rehashed for me growing up. Michael was the better of the two I gather, but Brian was superb in his own right. Ronald De Boer had a stint at Rangers too, another pair of excellent brothers in the game.
Eagle
They sure don’t. It’s an abysmal era for quality midfielders
Hopefully the new up and comers may change that. Used to love a blood and thunder battle in the middle of the park
Un
How can leave out Frank Mclintock and plenty of others
Unaai
I grew up on the blue side but couldn’t help but love a bit of Henrik both arms out, tongue out, dreads flying, the he scored. Was fun to watch.
Yea Gio was quality, Arteta was, young Barry Ferguson was excellent but lacked mobility for the top top end. Caniggia had a spell at Rangers, big Dado Prso was good for a couple of seasons, Craig Moore was a unit, Kanchelskis did well.
I was talking about the late 90s era hill wood
PL Hardman XI:
GK: Crazy Jens
RB: Pearce CB: Stam CB: Ruddock/Terry LB: Kolasinac 😀
CM: Keano CM: CM: Vieira CM: Vinnie Jones
ST: Duncan Ferguson ST: Shearer
Rino Gattuso was a head case and a half at Rangers lol imagine, it was as he is…only immature and more hotheaded 😂
Unn
Keane vs Vieira middle of the park used to be electric. Even AW bought into the animosity with Fergie, fuck me those match-ups were the days.
Forgot about prso
Don’t forget guppy, Alan Thompson, Sutton, Hartson, Viduka, Di Canio,Van hoijdonk (I know) bobo Balde. Liam Miller was great at Celtic too before United ruined him.
Ah bollocks, need another ST.
I’ll throw in Kevin Davies, was such a prick to play against but you can’t say he wasn’t hard as nails.
Emery saying we are working to sign a winger and a CB.
Interesting.
What about Tierney?
Charlie
You ever read Pirlo’s book? Bits about pranking Gattuso are hilarious.
Weagle
Kevin Muscat would make his way in that side no? He wasn’t a footballer, violent cunt he was.
Idk if he played top flight in England though, can’t remember. Youtube him for a sense of what UFC was about before it formed. Cunt.
Eagle
Nothing else compared. Nothing. Those matches were the pinnacle of football for me. The quality and ferociousness in those meetings were absolute world class.
You’ll never get that again. It’s just died. Football is too friendly now. The international game dying seems to coincided with the lax attitude to aggression during football matches
Lolz at Chambers being an option at CB…
Again, I’d take a Cahill type or even a Dani Alves type for a year and sell off Chambers and send AMN on loan somewhere, same with Mavropanos, kid is always injured, do away with him now.
Liked Ceballos, look foward to him and Torreira and less of Xhaka(can only hope).
Again, Emery has to know he needs options at CB, doesn’t matter who plays with the current bunch, they’re all useless
Alan Thompsons face always did me right in, idk why. Loved Bobby Petta for some reason, left footer thing I reckon. Neil McCann another that was exciting, young Lovenkrands too.
haha big Bobo Balde, what a clumsy cunt he was. Could snap you in half though, same vein as that big prick Rangers got eventually Marvin Andrews. Not footballers at all, just massive massive athletic guys.
Big Dunc and Jaap Stan were two hard bastards.
Big dunc had to be the Lionel Messi of footballing tough men from my era though
Remember when he choked Stefan freund and nearly poopped his head off
weagle
no, never read that? I bet pranking Rino was peak banter until he threw a wobbler lol
Charlie
Na can respect hardmen even if some of them left the foot in or flayed the old elbows going up for headers.
Likes of Muscat, Matterazzi, Nigel De Jong, Dennis Wise, Cattermole are just non-redeeming malginant cunts that had no place on a football pitch however.
Neville brothers were dirty but were more sly about it, still resent them for butchering Reyes and sending him off back to Spain.
https://www.toffeeweb.com/season/03-04/reports/Leicester%28a%29.asp
Dunc’s expression is hilarious
I used to know a fella who grew up with him and his brothers from a small Scottish fishing community. Sandy mcbastard everyine called him.
Said that they were all big nuts and loved a punch up
Booing might get him to call his agent. Shite player
Weagle I was thinking that actually, Muscat wasn’t a hard man he was a thug. There’s a clear difference as you say. Just watched a couple of his efforts, such a prick idk how someone never put the boot in on him back then proper. You could late 90’s, there was a balance between craft and destruction. Sad, but you sort of don’t see a Vieira thriving in modern football because the game never hits those scrappy luls, not at the top end. Now your bite is a Fernandinho, and I’m sorry but as good as he is, he’s not… Read more »
You can add Ben Thatcher to the thug list and wannabe hard man, would shit himself if he ran into any of those fellas.
https://www.goal.com/en-my/news/3899/italy/2014/04/16/4755962/the-hilarious-story-of-rino-gattuso-trying-to-kill-andrea
Give that a read Charlie. Pirlo wasn’t just a great player, guy was hysterical.
Football was better then. No doubt. Was a proper contact sport and much more gladiatorial.
Again coincided with the loss of leadership. Football teams used to be full of leaders. Not any more
Our own Peter Storey was one guy we could do with at the moment.
“No prisoners with Him.”
Was Ben Thatcher the guy that sparked out Pedro Mendes?
Duncan Ferguson.
Would have loved to see him and Zlatan kick off.
The good old Sottish handshake versus the Taekwondo king.
Now that would be interesting.
WE
“Likes of Muscat, Matterazzi, Nigel De Jong, Dennis Wise, Cattermole are just non-redeeming malginant cunts that had no place on a football pitch however. ”
The difference between the hard men and arseholes is that if you kicked a hard man he kicked back harder. Those fuckers would cry and look to the ref to protect them. Dele Ali is a current example leaves his studs in but would run from a fight in a second.
I still can’t believe that there isn’t a story of Keane and Vieira taking it outside after a match
Agree Charlie and Unn. Game has moved much more towards finesse and simulation. It’s a lot more cold and calculated now with players looking for any excuse to throw themselves to the ground and you can’t just blame it on the foreign players anymore, the English lads are some of the worst offenders in Young, Dele Alli, Kane. Teams were full of leaders back in the day. I mean Vieira was the clear alpha and leader in the Invincibles but you also had Campbell, Henry, Bergkamp, Lehmann, Cole, Lauren who were all huge personalities and would be the undisputed leader… Read more »
Joey Barton another modern fanny hardman wannabe, doesn’t he consider himself a bit of an intellectual too these days?
You know, between GBH sentences…
Funny stuff that. Gattuso sounds like a right laugh. None of those Milan players mentioned looked like they had a sense of humour. Eating live snails for a bet…. 🤮
Sparked out is one way to describe it.
Ran into him full-speed and threw as hard an elbow as he could muster and that Jon Jones would be proud of and he was a big lumbering defender with Mendes a little finesse player.
He didn’t get up for about 10 minutes. Keano would have laid him out flat if he was on Pompey.
Weagle
Yea it really has, technique has improved massively, speed is up, but aggression and fight are way down. It’s a different sort of elite, but just seemed to have a perfect blend around that time where games were won with skill, magic, or outright fight. Don’t see great showings of the latter modern day, all a bit stale and reliant on set pieces or a long ranger when stuff gets even.
I’d say the difference between the arse holes and hard men is that for the arse holes it was all a peacock display. Real tough get on with the game then wait for their moment and bang. They go through you
I used to have this chat with one of my team mates in the day
He would kick off and make a load of noise and it was just a display to look tough. I’d say keep your mouth shut cos you’re drawing attention. Just hit him and the ball hard when it comes.
CC
You’d just love to watch a wind up merchant on Barton. Worst kind of ignorant cunt – thinks he’s actually intelligent and can prove it by beating someone up.
I just watched that Thatcher clip again, Glen Johnson is a complete soggy biscuit to see that first hand and do little more than wave for a paramedic. Should’ve been that and then a dump tackle and right after left. Some criminals just manage to make it in sports, only explanation for moments like that
Marc
Yeah Alli is a little sly twerp. Was a great shot of him giving it the billy big bollocks routine in a ‘brawl’ in a NLD and he turned around to a deadpan Kolasinac and paced away with his head bowed down.
Eagle
Look at Italy. How many leaders they had from 94-06
Look at Holland. Stam. The de boers, ceedorff, bergkamp, Edgar Davids van Dee sar, koeman.
England had ince, platt, Shearer, Southgate, Neville, Gazza, Adams, Pearce, seaman, Campbell, rio, becks, batty, Scholes, Gerrard.
France team 98. Jam packed with leaders. Too many to mention.
The list could go on and on
Love to reminisce 90s/00s footy. And a time when Serie A had more top class players than you could shake a stick at. At the beginning of each season you could throw in 6 or 7 teams who could genuinely compete for the championship.
Marc
Barton was and probably is a cunt but at least he’s trying to mend himself. The cigar in the youth players eye was the worst one though. On tour in China.
Can you even fathom Terry, Gallas, Lampard, Drogba, Makelele or Essien acting the way the ‘skipper’ Azpilicueta did when Sarri was remonstrating with Kepa to get off the pitch in that Final?
Completely bitched out of any sort of leadership move/confrontation.
Anyone else ever play Championship Manager 2 Italian edition? Beppe Signori was my goal machine.
Chris
Yeah but only two normally did in the end
It was a faster more direct game for me. Less tikka takka and more dribbling. The 90s was a legendary era for mazy runs and every team had players who could do it. There’s only really Messi now.
What was that little city no7 back in the day: the Georgian. George something
Unai
Kinkladze. Little magician he was.
Eagle
Go further back to Roy Keane or Vinny Jones or Duncan Ferguson and he’d have been dragged by the collar
Unaai
barton just got a suspended sentence for head butting and punching an opposing manager down the tunnel and doing damage to his teeth and jaw.
I think trying to mend himself is a bit of a stretch lol he’s broken beyond repair. The mending shite is future income driven
Charlie
It really has. As much as it’s fun to romanticise the past, the game has come on leaps and bounds from a skill and technique POV. I watched a CL SF from 2002/03 recently, the Juventus-Real Madrid one.
I then watched the Bayern Munich-Real Madrid highlights from 2017 and the disparity in technical quality was pretty stark. Having said that, the stand out players in Ronaldo, Zidane and Nedved would be great today as they were then.
Serie A week to remember has a series of last day title races, Milan pipped Juve in 99, Lazio did over Milan the next year. It was the time all the record deals were happening there, Veron, Vieri, Shevchenko etc.
Saturday morning was always James Richardson on Gazzetta Italia. No YouTube for highlights back then kids!
Chris that’s it
Some great runs he made
Le tissier was a master
Darren huckerby at Coventry
Ketsbia and asprilla ay Newcastle. His hat trick vs Barca was ace
DI Canio loved a run. Those were the days man. Any team could unlock you with a fantasy player
You do t get that any more in the lower sides
Used to really enjoy watching Darren Huckerby.
What’s the point in booing Mustafi?
If we keep seeing the same mistakes from the same players, I’m intended to believe the coach might be doing something wrong.
For heaven’s sake, the hotline is killing us.
Shevchenko was the fucking man. Loved that Milan side with him, Kaka, Pirlo, Maldini, Nesta, Seedorf.
Having said that he robbed Thierry’s Ballon D’or in 2004.
That Lazio side was unreal
Then we beat them the following year with DB10 playing right wing.
Weagle
Yea for sure, some of the absolute ballers could still stand and stare a hole through your soul, Zizou one of them. Bergkamp was nasty at times.
Wondering who of the elite now could go back, Messi could take it, Ronaldo too, Neymar is a toss up because he’s taken some unreal fouling all his life but if it wasn’t given would he pout or develop a bit of an edge? Ozil maybe……. LOL
Cc
Oh shit did he? Ah there’s no helping him then. He need to spend his life in Tibet with the shaolin monks. Doubt they could help him.
Unai
Always used to be mesmerised by Ginola’s runs and skill, McManaman a great dribbler also. Nearly always gave us nightmares, in conjunction with Fowler.
CC
I think Mbappe would have flourished in that era.
WE
The best part of that brawl was Lich going in full steam and he was only warming up.
The ref should have shown him and Sissoko red cards.
The game has come on but it’s lost the blood and thunder it had before and it’s lost the art of the dribble for me
Like I said every team had one in the 90s.
Charlie
Yeah Messi could take it, has those ridiculously powerful squat legs even if he’s tiny. Remember when I was in Barcelona a couple of years ago and got tickets to their last league game vs Eibar and being amazed by how jacked and powerful Messi looked in the flesh, Suarez too.
Just can’t appreciate it as much seeing them on TV surrounded by 6 foot plus physical monster defenders.
Chris
Did Macca the Celtic run then exact same thing to villa a week later. Should have been better for England him.
Ginola forgot him.
“I think trying to mend himself is a bit of a stretch lol he’s broken beyond repair. The mending shite is future income driven”
Barton is a retarded thug. Guy should be horse whipped to death in public as a warning to other cunts sort it out or you’re next.
Pablo Aimar
Saviola
Michael Owen used to run through players for fun before he done his hamstring at Leeds in 99
Definitely not as many dribblers in the modern game. Plenty of that down to efficiency as dribblers generally have very high turnover rates unless they are prime Messi/Neymar.
But fuck me, is there a better sight in football than a great dribbler in full flow? Henry was pure magic when he was going from 0-100 in the space of a couple of seconds all the while showing sublime control of the ball and awareness of what was going on around him.
I can’t think of one aspect the game has actually moved on since the nineties. Speed of the game etc keep getting put forward but am really struggling to see how a McTomminay- Herrera or Xhaka – Torreira partnership is going to be too quick and powerful for any midfield of the nineties. Remember an ancient Ryan Giggs moving into central midfield at 35 and 36 and making players ten years or more younger look completely sub-standard. Guti of Real Madrid is another player you just don’t see now. All-round skill set, could keep it tidy in midield, run with… Read more »
Unai
Yeah McManaman one of several players who never really hit heights for England, same with Fowler, Andy Cole, could probably come up with more. Hard to explain We had so many great strikers who never really got game time and/or just didn’t do the business.
Eagle
No. It’s the reason we all watch the game
Tell that to Messi. I’d rather watch a little bit of on the ball fantasy than keep ball. As a neutral