Arsene Wenger had a mad bit of banter in the press.

Firstly, he shared with you what I told you as soon as he was booted… you know, that he was booted.

“The timing was not really my decision. And for the rest I’ve spoken about it already.”

Shortly after the press, he likely landed a call from HR. Then his tune changed.

“After reaching agreement about my departure, I was happy for the club to decide when to announce,” the statement said .”I wish to make it clear the timing of the announcement was right.”

In America, when you’re fired or asked politely to leave, they make you sign a ‘I won’t be salty in the media’ agreement. One would assume Stan gave Wenger the £9m on the proviso he keeps his mouth shut and doesn’t make life hard for Ivan and the new manager coming in.

Pretty amusing. Also amusing for all the sycophants that believed Wenger left without taking severance.

Patrick Vieira slipped into some sexy panties and flaunted his career desires all over the media today.

“It’s an honour to be mentioned with Arsenal – I love the club. I played my best football there and made my name in the game.”

“I am always going to have a deeper relationship with Arsenal. That is not enough to coach that team but I’m ready to coach any side in Europe.”

I love Patrick, I truly do. He’s a warrior, a leader, and a smart man. However, I just can’t get onboard with him coming to the club. Some of the papers are saying he’s Wenger’s pick… there’s simply no way the club are going to roll with the kiss of death from an ex-manager, and look, his record is hardly impressive.

His New York club don’t play great football, they’re hardly dominant, and the caliber of the game over here is absolute pony. I’d love to have him join the staff in a coaching capacity, but there’s no way he’s ready for the Arsenal role. If you’re coming in as a risk, you have to have some sort of prodigal talent that stands you out, a 45% win rate in MLS for one of the richest teams isn’t good enough.

I’d say he could run the academy, but Per Mertesacker is taking on that duty. I was a bit rude about his appointment a few months ago, but apparently, I need to be thrashed for uttering such concerns. The BFG has been landing glowing reports from people around the club for his leadership skills behind the scenes. He’s been working with the kids, keeping spirits high and just being an all-round total hero. Apparently we’d be in much worse shape if he weren’t there.

When it comes to the emotional intelligence I spoke about yesterday, there’s no doubt that he has that in abundance. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a bad word said about him. After reading that incredibly candid interview of him in Kicker, and hearing his taking responsibility for a broken Arsenal, I am very excited to see what he can do.

Someone was trying to convince me that Andries Joncker represented success during his time in the academy. One FA Cup youth final that was lost and an U23 league win being proof. That isn’t success people. Success is bringing through elite talent. We have young players at the club, but I wouldn’t say much of that is about our academy. You can talk about Nelson, Nketiah and Willock. But I could point you to a whole host of young talent that had lots of excitement back in the day but never made it. Bartley, Watt, JET, Lansbury, Simpson, Sunu were all exciting in 2009, where did they end up?

Southampton has a successful academy. That’s what we should model our dreams on.

Anyway, talking of dreams, how about the Arsene Wenger farewell tour dream of going all the way for the Europa League #BackDoorTopFour push? The press asked Simeone whether Diego Costa was coming to play, or to just scare the Arsenal players.

“Knowing Diego, I think all of those apply to him,”

“In England and Spain, many teams have suffered at the hands of Diego. It is not just Arsenal.”

Look, I’m just going to put it out there, last time we saw Costa he was buried in Rob Holding’s pocket in the FA Cup final. He’s not scary anymore. Right? Come on? I’m right? No?

Ok, there’s a slight worry Costa is going to drop us over his knee and spank us, but it’s not a certainty he’ll start. I do think Simeone might be tempted to start him. His side are great at home having won 10 of 11 games with 10 clean sheets, however, away from home, they’ve conceded in each of their last 8 and they haven’t won in their last 4 games.

If Arsenal has a chance, it’s tonight at home. Our fortress. Our safe space. The place where dreams are made. Kind of…

This is massive for the players. They’re not playing for their holidays, they’re playing for their careers. The players are more than capable of lifting their game for the big occasion, we saw that in the incredible FA Cup final last season. They need to bring that magic to the ground tonight.

Ramsey is on the same page as me…

“It’s a massive motivation, to put the emotional side to one side and use it to go on and win this trophy for him.

It’d be a great way to go. I think Atleti will be coming for a 0-0, knowing we’re there for the taking in the away leg. I’d hope Arsenal go all out to ruffle their feathers. I’d love to see Danny W have another blinder, his form since returning has been excellent and he is an absolute man-monster to deal with when he’s tuned into the game. Ramsey needs to bring beast mode and show the whole of Europe he’s the hottest Welshman this summer. You’d also hope Lacazette can continue his free-scoring. Maybe a bit extra in it for him after his move there failed?

We also need a focused game from our defence. Ospina will start, which is about as worrying as Cech starting, so no loss there. Whoever makes up the rest need to focus. I really don’t want to lose this game on a stupid Koscielny error, or a rush of blood from Mustafi.

Winning Europa might change the type of manager we hire. The frontrunner according to the press is now Luis Enrique. I’d not be upset, the guy has won the Champions League, he’ll massively elevate how we play, and he’ll bring a discipline and intensity we’ve lacked for years. My worry is he’s not the best candidate. He’s not a bad one. I just think if we’re dishing out £15m a year, it should go on Allegri.

I also think that it’s a massive risk giving the club to someone who has dealt with the best of the best. Doing amazing things with amazing players is a talent, don’t get me wrong. But we don’t have amazing players, we have average resources, and we’re a major rebuilding project.

Shouldn’t we be looking for coaches doing a lot with a little? Read about Jardim here and tell me he’s not perfect? He’s used to working under tough conditions, he’s a master of developing young players (a critique of Enrique is he didn’t bring through players), and he gives you all the attacking flair of #WengerBall. If not him, then Nagelsmann and Tedesco are doing great things with limited budgets.

We need great ideas, not a prestige coach. We are not Barcelona. I worry that Raul S might be in danger of trying to recreate Barcelona on a budget. Wenger tried that post 2006. It didn’t work out.

Anyway, that’s a story for another day, for tonight, we dine in hell… or Piebury Corner before the match, making sure we get into the ground on time.

Don’t be tardy, and know I am jealous as one can be that I’m not there with you! x