The… ‘oh please pipe down’ award this morning goes to The Independent for trying to craft a story of outrage about Arsene’s comments after he was asked what he’d have done if Chelsea scored.
“I don’t know, maybe I would have gone home and committed suicide tonight.”
The tabloid that masquerades as a semi-broadsheet is really trying its hardest to land a sucker punch on an under-fire manager by calling up mental health charities to land a clickable hot take on why he was such a bastard for an off the cuff remark. I’m not Logan Paul-ing here by any stretch – like many of you, I’m personally invested in mental health issues that have impacted my life… which is why this sort of nasty cheap journalism is so abhorrent.
It’s an embarrassingly poor attempt to lean into internet outrage to get more advert impressions, against a man who is spectacularly attuned to culture compared to most in sport. I mean, let’s be honest, a failed attempt. The people gave it a whopping zero comments, and only 36 shares (‘London cocaine delivers quicker than pizza’ landed 20 times more shares).
Terrible content game.
Onto more substantive topics.
SVEN MADE HIS FIRST SIGNING.
Sure, it’sAsano levels of low-key, but who cares. This is how big clubs work. Top scouts raid the unexpected places to land opportunities. Will Konstantinos Mavropanos make it? It’s going to be tough coming into a club where you’re not really coached, but look, at least he’s Sven’s signing. He’s huge, he’s young, and you never know.
Welcome to Arsenal regardless.
There’s a bit of a nothing story on Sky stating Auba of Dortmund is our first choice replacement if Sanchez leaves. I have trouble believing this mostly because he’ll be expensive, we know he wants Milan and you’d imagine we’d want our money to go further than a megastar because we’ll be skint-ish based on losing potentially two of our main stars.
Or will we? The Soccerex Top 10 clubs was FINALLY revealed.
1. Manchester City
4. Guangzhou Evergrande
6. Real Madrid
7. Manchester United
10. Bayern Munich
Would you look at that, Arsenal sitting in 2nd. Here’s how it’s calculated.
“The Soccerex Football Finance 100 also takes into account the value of clubs’ players, their fixed assets such as stadiums and training grounds, the amount of money they have in the bank as well as net debt.”
Soooo what have we here? Proof that the club has been having us on when they bitch about being skint? Kind of. We don’t need to spend like City to compete, but it does show that if we want to blow £200m one year, it’s not beyond us. We’re rich enough to deal with a big investment.
The important thing you need to remember though is this: We don’t want Wenger spending that money. Our manager turned down signing Kante because he thought Xhaka and Coquelin were the future.
His issue isn’t that he doesn’t spend enough, it’s that he spends badly and doesn’t know how to coach players anymore. Chambers isn’t a bad player, he’s just not taught properly. Holding should be way better than he is now, but he’s regressing at a club that doesn’t value education. AMN could be the real deal, a centre midfielder for us for 10 years, but he’s going to have to educate himself if he wants to attain Kante levels of hero.
I assume the club know the state of play. We’ve missed out on some unreal players over the past three years for absurd reasons. We’ve also signed a lot of talent that’s gone to shite. We just need to sit out the dross of Wenger then the club will find the promised land.
Finally, a lot of chat about the Eden Hazard penalty. I can’t abide by it. The foot touching his foot was highly contentious. Contact in football isn’t illegal. He’d have never won the penalty if he didn’t simulate the fall. Simple as that. If you have to simulate contact, it’s not proper contact, is it?
Also, the VAR opponents highlighting how video reffing in sport has killed the game. Please, it’s such a backwards notion to fear trying something more accurate because there might be problems.
There is nothing pure about bad decisions. It doesn’t bring any joy. It’s also a false notion that shitty decisions keep the play moving.
Give me an extra 10 minutes on the game for more accurate results over the pain of being stiffed on bad human decisions any day of the week.
This really bland notion that Sky Sports spoil fans because of their incredible HD replays is so maddening. Like debating decisions is somehow a new thing. English fans are still bitching about the Hand of God. Germans are still talking about 1966. English fans are bitter that karma denied them in 2010. I’M STILL FURIOUS ABOUT STEPHANE HENCHOZ DENYING HENRY. Debating decisions isn’t a new thing. No fan enjoys getting fucked over by bad officiating. At the core, what sort of masochist doesn’t want a rightful outcome in sport?
The Premier League sells because it’s fast. As long as the FA and the Premier League are working together to push more efficient decision times, we’ll be good.
Right, I believe that’s all I have for you. See you in the comments.