BATE BORISOV, THEY LIKE TO SCORE SOME GOALS, THEIR GROUND IS VERY COLD, BAAAAATE BORISOV, WOOOOAAHHH
This the haunting tune that shall reverberate around Barysaw this evening. The CHAMPIONS of Belarus banged in 6 goals in their last game against the not so mighty FK Slutsk… sounds like… no, I’m above ‘sounds like’ jokes. They have scored 44 goals in 23 Premier League games this year. Their stadium cost €40m, less than Ozil, and it holds 13,126 people. Cosy. They have an average squad age of 26, men of honour, in their prime, ready to DESTROY Arsenal if they so allow.
Anyway, Wenger is taking this super chill, fam. He’s rested a lot of players, prioritising the Premier League on Sunday against Brighton.
Ospina, Cech, Macey, Mertesacker, Holding, Mustafi, Wilshere, Elneny, Maitland-Niles, Walcott, Giroud, Nelson, Willock, McGuane, Dasilva, Akpom, Gilmour, Debuchy.
Look at that squad. I only know two of the names there!
Still, at least it should fun. I’d love to see Reiss Nelson given a run. I reckon we’ll see Wilshere land a start after PLENTY of chat about his participation in games this month. I also have a feeling we’ll see Theo Walcott rock a start, because, well, he costs us over £100k a week so we should probably put him on the pitch occasionally.
I have very low expectations around this game. We should be winning even with an average team, my worry is Wenger hardly supercharges his first team for a West Brom game, heavens knows how players are going to feel about playing in a area of Europe they’ve probably had to have explained to them three of four times.
Theo: So it’s Spain?
AW: No, it’s Belarus
Theo: What part of Spain is it like?
AW: It’s not. It’s Belarus, a place called Barysaw
Theo: Who is Barry?
AW: It’s like Spain
Should be mad banter. For Theo, as a coffee lover, my recco would be Я и Ты – Моё любимое кафе! Menu is looking pretty damn tasty.
Right, that’s me done. See you on the other side. Canny wait for this one!