I’m back in the UK, grey, moody but mildly warmer than NY. Mega bonus. So on that note, why don’t we start Eeyore of Arsenal, Mesut Ozil:
“When the team’s on a bad run, somebody needs to be singled out, sadly most of the time it’s me.”
What’s that you can hear? The faint notes of the world’s tiniest ‘GROW THE FUCK UP’ trumpet playing to the soundtrack of Titanic. Honestly, Arsenal fans give that man too much wiggle room as it is. Fantastic player, elite passer, unreal productivity numbers last season… but look, there are some major flaws.
#1 Character. Always goes missing in the big games. He earns the big dollar, wants more dollar, but can’t show up against a top 6 side? SAD! If scoring against shite teams was the benchmark for greatness, then Oli Giroud would be at Barcelona. Also worth noting that the fans crying about how brutal English football is for not understanding wallflower Ozil should revisit the reason Carlo let him go. Character, straight up, in words.
#2 Fitness. Very difficult to argue the curve to Mesut’s season. He starts really well, we think he is on course to overtake Thierry for god-like status… then we roll into Christmas, his game dips, then the second half of the season, we lose him… every damn time it’s the same. Same happened this year. Where has he been in 2017?
#3 Fucks Given. He covers a lot of ground, but look, there are no excuses to the half-arsed nonsense we all see with our eyes. Obvious points, how about walking away for the challenge for Everton’s second away from home. If you’re that interested, have a dig around for moments when Ozil literally couldn’t give a rats arse about the team. It’s cool to be an Ozil-toligist, but most of the time, it’s isolating moments, rather than the bigger picture.
#4 Team. Not often your best player is the subject of leaks. Mesut was. Remember the story doing the rounds about him being undroppable? You don’t leak stories like that if you have Cristiano and Messi playing every game. My point here is even his own teammates don’t think he’s putting in a shift.
So, when Mesut is crying about being singled out, he should be, because he’s our star man and he’s not doing his job properly or consistently enough. Crying about being the star man as you’re negotiating a £280k a week contract is embarrassing, but it does perfectly sum up the lack of spine the team has. It’s an honour to be the scapegoat because it usually means there are high expectations. Ronaldo is a scapegoat when things go wrong at Madrid, he takes it. That’s what Champions do.
Trouble is, we don’t foster Champions. We baby children, fat on entitlement. We get the results we deserve.
In more banterous news, The Daily Star reports that if Arsene is tanked on Sunday, he’ll pack it all in and leave. The only reason I give this any sort of oxygen is The Star was actually PHWs paper of choice to leak to back in the day, when he was relevant to fans because he always shat on them at the AGMs. Anyway, who here thinks Arsene would leave if he was tanked? Not me. No chance. The guy could crash a busload of hookers into the Thames, drunk, wearing a bondage suit and he’d still carry on. The guy is shameless, the club is spineless and any story like this is just a total nonsense.
For the protestors out there, the crew are meeting at 2:50 on Sunday. They have a surprise for the protest. I hope it’s better than Wenger’s surprise signing 2008… which was Mikael Silvestre. What a moment that was. Turn up if you care about Arsenal, he’s still not put pen to paper, so technically, he might be googling his name to check if the fans still detest this situation and his continued smelly lingering.
4) Join the protest. New details for Sunday. Meet 2:50 opposite Box Office/Highbury House, on Drayton Park, just round from Arsenal tube.
— #WengerOut (@NoNewContract) March 29, 2017
Fingers crossed. Hope he leaves. Shameless hostage taker.
Right, see you in the comments.