What’s leading to this thought?
- He’s tying down a whole bunch of players at the same time, you know, the sort other managers might be moving on, namely Per M, Chambo, and a now broken Santi. Wenger hoarding names like old ice cream tubs and newspapers, a PTSD reaction to being forced to sell big names back in the day
- The players are dropping the ‘the boss (because we have to call him that) is like a loving PE teacher that holds you in the shower without touching your safe place’ comments in the press. Ozil, Mustafi and Giroud all within a week.
- There are two players that haven’t signed deals yet, that’s Alexis Sanchez and Mesut Ozil.
Two thoughts I have on the last mentioned situation…
#1 Wenger likes to be the best paid, so he’ll be waiting to see what they get so he knows what figure to put on his contract for Stan K to sign off.
#2 Arsenal would never miss an opportunity to polish a big fat giant turd of a situation by drowning it with our three most important squad members, sitting on a table, signing away their lives.
The fans would crow…
‘Pedro, you see, Arsene is still an elite manager because they all signed up for more years of comfort under big papa bear’
It really is utterly depressing. Two more years of abject mediocrity. Watching those around us grow stronger as Wenger manages his team like a bored stay-at-home-mum’s ‘something to do for 2017 project’, because clearly, by now, it’s pretty damn obvious to us and him that he can’t beat out the competition, so he’s just here to make up the numbers.
Groundhog day is fast approaching too. I’m in a cold sweat. I can see the future and it’s so familiar it’s intimate. NOT in a sexy way.
We have Chelsea early February which will likely put a double taser and a friendly knee to the face to our title challenge and relegate us to a thrilling ‘will they / won’t they’ battle with Spurs. We’ll win out in an unlikely twist of fate at the death no doubt. Then we have the first leg of the Champions League, or as I like to call it, our penultimate game, against Bayern Munich, who will do to us what Swansea tried for 39minutes at the weekend… but with good players. We’ll duck out at the last 16 for the 7th straight year… but it’ll be fine, because it was the draw that did it. Not the complete incompetence of a manager who doesn’t quite agree with the 2017 version of football.
Anyway, dropping into a power misery here. I’m ill, I just killed another batch of plants (succulents, like, how does that happen?) and a took an ill-advised risk on a 2 day old chinese.
I can’t help it though, Wenger is the Rasputin of football, the man just doesn’t know when to call it a day. Based on fear of the unknown post-retirement life, an outrageous lust for power and years spent building an indestructible ivory tower, it was always fanciful to think he’d call time before shit hit the fan.
I just find it so sad. It’s the Never-ending story without a flying dog. It’s groundhog day without Bill Murray’s banter. It’s a bad version of Inception, I’m stuck at Arsenal vs West Brom, the stadium is spinning on an axis, I can see is Giroud warming up on 70minutes, the grating sound of Wenger struggling with his zipper reverberates like a hacksaw in my head, I’ve just dropped my £12.99 salt beef bagel in a puddle of top 4 mediocrity, Jonny Evans has equalised with his arse and my Bovril has a slight leak in the lid.
This is too much… tap me out.
No, read these stats from the Online Gooner who had a great day yesterday.
* 33 years in management – 4 League titles
* In 20 years at Arsenal – won 57.28% of our games. Won 9 trophies at an average of 127.44 games per trophy.
Now stats don’t mean anything until you compare like with like.
* Ferguson – won 59.67% of games. Games per trophy 45.45.
* Mourinho (with Chelsea) – won 66% of games. Games per trophy 46.
* George Graham – won 49.02% of games. Games per trophy 76.83.
Then take a read of this too. Blistering array of facts that’ll take any apologist to ground.
‘A good cook never blames his tools. Wenger has blamed financial doping, referees, the fourth official, Brexit, injuries, opposition tactics, good defending, the global financial crisis, and has gone as far as blaming the fans themselves for his unique ability to fail in the same manner every season. The concept of taking responsibility doesn’t exist at Arsenal, another thing unique among Europe’s big clubs. I’ve always wondered how any self-respecting business could allow a highly-paid employee to make the kind of embarrassing comments Wenger and his players make without censure. He has no excuses about being new to English football, all the players are his and he’s had over 12 years to do something of relevance – you’re lucky if you get 12 months at a Real Madrid or Bayern. Which makes me giggle whenever Wenger “reminds” us of the offers he’s turned down. I wonder how long Madrid or Bayern fans would tolerate Almunia in goal, or fourth place, or an 8-2 defeat!’
Before you potter off to hang yourself in the cloakroom, listen to the podcast below.
Thanks for the feedback, we’ll be upping our game on the next one and bringing you special sauce and a happy ending ‘erry week.
SEE YOU TOMORROW x
At least this guy is having a good day.
This guy is having the most lit day ever pic.twitter.com/Ifz1O3N669
— BroCulture (@BroCulture) January 17, 2017