Fixture list suits a title win | Gold kit fact you need to hear

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Oh deary me, I hit peak wanker yesterday, I went to a food festival. What have I become? I don’t mean to be a total killjoy, but there’s something incredibly vulgar about heading into an event that sells £9 Kobe beef burgers that are so small, they’d look like half pounders in Santi Cazorla’s hands.

I couldn’t get involved in the fanfare. What did make me laugh is that the biggest queue was for Meat Mission (dirty burgers), basically the pot noodle of the event. Something else that made me laugh? They had a food stand in association with action for hunger… SELLING WELL EXPENSIVE WRAPS.

‘Guys, I feel really good about this £9 duck tongue wrap, because, you know, poor people in Croydon get free rice and stuff’

 

I guess, at the heart of it, I don’t give a shit about the latest artisan twist on beans on toast and I have no interest in queuing for a ‘the best cheese toastie’ in London.

Anyway, I enjoyed the beer… Waaaahhhhhwyyyy! Lad, lad, lad! TOP BOY!

So what can I serve you up that’s delicious, overpriced and probably endangered?

Well, ol’ Del Boy Dangote has been back in the press talking about buying Arsenal.

‘When we get this refinery on track, I will have enough time and enough resources to pay what they are asking for,’

Sounds like me when I’m talking about getting the kitchen back on track. This guy might be mega, but he’s not more mega than Alisher. The Uzbek doesn’t need to save to buy a football club. If anyone is buying, it’s him. Has Dangote even landed one share? Joker. Come back when you’re serious. I have more shares than him (my dad does, but when I take him out this Christmas, it’s mine).

He even managed to balls up what’s going on.

“They are doing well, but they need another strategic direction. They need more direction than the current situation, where they just develop players and sell them.”

So 2011. He clearly doesn’t tune in here religously to land the latest news, views and opinions. That’s upsetting.

There are a few rumours floating around that our Puma Away shirt is going to be gold. Thierry said that was his favourite. He also noted we never lost in it. Maybe he dropped that because he was playing the PR game!

No Thierry? Say it ain’t so?

Anyway, I like gold kits. Wonder if the inspo (yeah, I said inspo) came from this from last  year?

arsenal-mock-up

Doubtful, but why not snipe at Puma’s creative integrity on a downtime for real football news?

So, the news is in… fixtures.

  • West Ham (H)
  • Palace (A)
  • Liverpool (H)
  • Newcastle (A)

Bit of a weird one, because right now, it’s easy to say those are easy games, but all those teams are capable of turning us over if they have a positive summer. The start is of such high importance for us.

Other games worth mentioning… Boxing Day is away at Southampton. First game of the new year is Newcastle. We have Chelsea mid-September, United start of October and Spurs at the start of November.

March, April and May are pretty damn easy. So if we have a strong start and we get to March in with a shout… we really could do something special (WIN THE DAMN LEAGUE MAN).

Right, that’s enough from these finger tips. On that note, the old phrase was the pen is mightier than the sword? Bit dated. What’s the score now? I don’t even think I could write with a pen these days? The digits are mightier than the semi automatic?

Who knows.

x

P.S. I wrote something for The Daily Mail about Jack Wilshere. Oh shhhh, save your boos.

472 Responses to “Fixture list suits a title win | Gold kit fact you need to hear”

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  1. Wallace

    Bamford

    “Even if I rated Coquelin as highly as you do, I still would want another CDM of his quality or better.”

    we buy a 25m midfielder and whoever loses out – the new guy or Coquelin – will ask for a transfer at the end of the season. outside of Bayern name me a top side which has two top quality DMs in their squad, one of whom is happy to sit on the bench for most of the season?

  2. El Tel 1

    Also think Kosser could be ejected.

    Barca showing interest.

    Gabby will get the gig.

    Howedes to be signed too.

  3. mysticleaves

    Wallace June 18, 2015 21:17:06
    Bamford
    “Even if I rated Coquelin as highly as you do, I still would want
    another CDM of his quality or better.”
    we buy a 25m midfielder and whoever loses out – the new
    guy or Coquelin – will ask for a transfer at the end of the
    season. outside of Bayern name me a top side which has two
    top quality DMs in their squad, one of whom is happy to sit on
    the bench for most of the season?

    this!!!
    People (especially Bamford) don’t realise that Arteta and Flaming played little to no part in the second half of the season and we still had a congested middle.

    Even if we buy “someone better than Coq” we need to sell Arteta, Flaming and one other CM.

    Another DM ain’t even a priority if any sort, even in case of injury as Arteta, Ramsey, Wiltshire can cover for 3 games?

  4. AbdulDT

    I don’t think we will get another DM even if we all know we should. Wenger wouldn’t want to hamstring coq’s progress and in the event we need to rotate etc. Wenger will find an “internal solution” he always prefers (cazorla role eg). When we were chasing games last season, Wenger withdrew coq and Ramsey dropped deep and given the no of cms in the side its not inconceivable that he would try something like that. Even if both arteta and flamini left (which i don’t see happening), we still won’t get another midfielder!!

  5. Dark Hei

    Dear Coquelin,

    Arsenal FC is going to buy a DM for big $$. Which means you will be starting next season on the bench as big $$ DM has expressed that he will sign only if he is assured of a starting spot.

    Not to worry. The position “competition for big $$ DM” is a worthy spot for someone who was only playing for Charlton last season. There are also plenty of milk cups and FA cups, I mean games, to keep you motivated and interested.

    To help achieve that, we will be kicking out the captain and Flamini to show you our sincerity towards squad players such as yourself.

    Love
    Bamford10

  6. N5

    Ha ha course it isn’t you Dark, you see the picture in the gravatar that is given uniquely to each person, so even if the name was the same, the picture wouldn’t be.

    You cheeky monkey!

  7. Wallace

    according to newspaper reports even closer to signing Cech. must be pitched up in a sleeping bag outside London Colney by now. massive signing if it does go through.

  8. Blsany

    Jim
    Cheers for the article man but that KONG to Milan is fucking bullshit i so want that player here.exactly what the doctor prescribed for Arsenal.How are these Italian teams affording all these young and upcoming players??.Dybala now KING KONG, Morata..etc.?

  9. Jim Lahey

    @Blsany – What I love about the Bergkamp goal, is that with all the amazing talent there has been in the last ten years, no one has been able to recreate it! People score from the half-way line every season, there are always bicycle kicks and Ramsey like volleys scored, but no one has down what he did on that day!

    I think Nasri’s Mouth pointed out that he has a release clause, so anyone can activate it, doesn’t mean he wants to go!