Well, Friday kicks off with an apology. Ched Evans apologising, kind of, in a certain way, not really, maybe… PLEASE GIVE ME A CLUB. Amusing the apology didn’t come before he found out his fathering law couldn’t pay off all the sponsors to land him a contract.
That guy must hold his daughter in high esteem… imagine Christmas dinner with that lot?
There aren’t many fantastical news stories geared around Arsenal today. Lukas said Wenger disrespected him. Think it’s time for Lukas to quieten down and crack on with Inter. Arsene whacked him on an unworthy £90k a week that affords him his own private social media agency to follow him around 24/7.
Deeper point here is what I said in October. If you freeze players out, it causes dressing room unrest. Lukas, clearly a major personality in the dressing room will talk to people, that causes negativity. Think what you like about Lukas, he was worthy of more game time than he picked up. Throw in Per complaining in the media about being beasted with no rest (and citing other players who’ve clearly been in his ear), Chezzer sparking up fat rollies in the changing rooms… and, well, you’ve a dressing room that’s lacking harmony and spirit.
Arsenal have given Dennis Wise son a 1 year deal at Arsenal. Would love it if he was a sublimely gifted Cesc like midfielder that his dad was ashamed of…
‘Son you’re a disgrace, you didn’t use your left elbow once… you’ll never amount to nuffin!’
Arsenal are close to nailing one transfer, Krystian Bielik. I know, I know, he’s going to be the greatest DM of all time because he’s unusual looking and tall. I love these transfers, because they always happen when we need an older version. You remember last summer? Suarez? No. Rooney? No. Higuain? No. Sanogo? YES.
Embecilo? Miyachi? Eisfeld? Bischoff? LUKE BLOODY FREEMAN. We’ve been in for some dreamboats. But this one might be special, so I shan’t say anything just in case he becomes a god and the muppet brigade on Twitter keep asking me about the time I said it wasn’t important to chase Bielik when we had a massive hole in our midfield.
The real bantz is that we’re negotiating hard for him… first bid rejected. A bit like Donald Trump negotiating for a scotch egg at Borough Market. Just pay the fee…
There’s talk that we’re interested in Gundogan. Ok, on the one hand he’s a sublime talent we really could do with, on the other, he’s an absolute car crash of a player when it comes to fitness. When people say, ‘it’s hard to pinpoint why we pick up so many injuries’, one of the reasons is that we quite often purchase players who aren’t up to the challenge in the first place. Gundogan is always injured. Our players are always injured because we don’t treat them as well as we could. Signing him is a match made in hell.
It’s all going down the toilet for Martinez at the moment. Secretly, I’m glad. I worried he’d be the obvious choice to replace Wenger. He’s a good coach, he’s a smart tactician, but I’ve never been sure whether he’s a leader and I’ve never been too taken by his approach to defending. This season, he’s paying the price of poor fitness management. The Guardian has them down for 20 hamstring injuries in 18 months. A shocking stat. I mean, talk about bad luck, eh (jokes)?
It’s interesting that they’ve changed their physio… feels a little bit like sacking the waiter for the declining quality of the food being served. If they’re having injuries to that level, you’d have to question what the hell he’s doing with his player in training. It also sounds like Martinez is in charge of solving the problem. Hardly an expert, is he?
Anyway, hopefully that rules him out of the new role at Arsenal.
I also read an interesting article from Honigstein about Pep at Bayern. And brace yourself for this. It’s exciting.
Bayern are preparing for life without Pep. He has 18 months left on his deal. He’s not talking about a new deal. He leaves it to the last minute. He could be off. If he becomes available and he wants to wake the sleeping giant that is Arsenal, I’d be sooooo excited.
Sorry Arsene, I don’t care how well you’re doing at the time, when Pep comes available, you shift out whoever is in charge and you give the role to him. Pay him what he wants, give him what he needs and watch the ascent.
One of the points raised in the article is that Pep isn’t making long term decisions. He’s all about nailing that Champions League trophy. He wants it for the CV. Maybe he’ll settle at his next club? There’s less pressure at Arsenal with all the same amenities you’d have at Barca (and a London lifestyle, which is ace). The English press are less interested in prying. The English public are far more forgiving than the Spanish. The Arsenal baseline is fairly low. The football philosophy at Arsenal matches what they have at Barca. Arsenal fans are outrageously grateful for fourth, imagine how much love we’d have for a manager with ambition that stretches to major trophies?
He could be our hero. Wenger was interested in Pep once. Interestingly, Pep nearly signed for Wigan under the mighty Paul Jewell.
If Pep signs, I’ll be a PKB for sure. Imagine the tonality of this blog if that happened? It’d be exceptional positivity, everyday. I’ll have keyword searches set up on Twitter to flag any negativity around the manager… I’d take them all down one person at a time…
‘End of the day, mate, who else is there? No one. Who could do a better job? No one. So shut up.’
Right, looking forward to hearing the Arsenal prezzer today. I hope Arsene rolls in with a Superking Menthol hanging from his mouth, just for the bantz.
HAVE A GOOD ONE.
I’m trialling a new format next week… gown blow your tiny minds people.