FA Cup final run in starts here…

by .

Capture

Good morning darlings. Today, I firstly need to tell you I pulled a hamstring, one, so I can make a quip about redzoning myself, two, so I can tell you that I went to the gym and exercised.

I know what you’re thinking, ‘Pedro pushed it to the next level’, yes people, yes I did.

TIM SHEERWOOD SACKED VERY FUNNY MOST AMUSING


So what am I doing this morning? Well, I landed an invite to go and watch the Arsenal press conference, followed by 15minutes worth of training.

I was like, errr, is it the right thing for me to be doing? Am I selling out?

Then I was like, no. Fuck it. Getting so close to Boro Priromac I can touch him? Every 29  year olds dream. Am I right? Hell yeah I’m right.

It’ll be quite interesting to hear how a real press conference goes. What is actually said, what’s missed in tonality, how Arsene is behaving… Sadly though, no questions for me. I’d only ask something about Lukas and that seal, so it’s probably a good thing.

I get to watch 15 minutes of training as well. So many instagrams coming your way, and a fresh batch for the headline pictures.

So, in short, this won’t be much of a post today.

SAMIR NASRI IS NOT GOING TO THE WORLD CUP SO SAD MANY TEARS

What is exciting is I’ve secured some pretty exciting writers to contribute this summer. I have talent from ESPN, Private Eye, The New York Times… I’m also going to tap some people up from the FT and The Guardian. I’m pushing the boat out this summer, last thing you want to be reading for three months is me banging on about injuries and goats. We’re also going to look at podcasting. Alex who writes here is a bit of an AKB, and he’s mildly amusing at times, so could make for a good listen. If it’s crap, then you’ll tell us and we’ll stop.

I also want to start getting some content from people. The youth at work communicate in GIFs, if you have Arsenal funnies, send them in and we can LOL (laugh out loud you old person).

Do you sense I’m fearing the summer?

Why would I be, when I can write about the Daily Mail covering our pursuit of a 15 year old Belgian kid from Anderlecht who honestly looks like he’s barely started puberty. Now, that’s not to say I like my 15 year olds mature, it’s merely to point out that we’re scouting a child and it’s making the news.

WAYNE ROONEY OVERLOOKED FOR UNITED CAPTAINCY BECAUSE HE IS ENGLISH HA OH HA YES EXPENSIVE PLAYER

Where’s Young Guns when you need him?

Word has crept out the Sagna is about to leave the Arsenal party. He’ll say his goodbyes at the Arsenal celebration (or commiseration) banquet the club are throwing on Sunday. I’d imagine a few of them will be saying their goodbyes. Fabianski, Vermaelen… Podolski if anyone will pay him £100k a week.

… but still, saying goodbye on a medal is the way to do it. That, and taking a giant crap on the Chairmans Bentley. That’s how I’m going out when the time comes. Cheerio, and good luck with that.

Right, I think that’s about as immature as it gets. If you work for a broadsheet, drop me a line, Le Grove has some probono work. Someone needs to up this shit show.

Today’s FA Cup Memory comes courtesey of Jem Packer, regular contributor to Private Eye (fancy).

‘She Wore A Black And White Ribbon’

1979, the sun is shining, the streets of Islington are awash with Arsenal scarves and banners and I am about to watch my first ever FA cup final on TV. In black. And white. Forget about discos and outlandish fashions, my 1970’s childhood was largely played out in monochrome. Sunday closing, winter of discontent, barely an Arsenal game on TV – it was all, well just a bit drab.

But on the 12th of May everything changed. As excitement grew for the upcoming match (Arsenal rosette on chest – check, jammy dodgers and iced gems on tap – check, pudding bowl haircut and national health specs – check) something extraordinary happened. My father, who had ‘popped out to buy a paper’, arrived at the door, flustered and excited, struggling with a large cardboard box. The weight was such we assumed he was carrying car engine parts or roof tiles.

But when he lugged it into the sitting room we dared to dream…

As he opened the box there it was – our first colour television! A Sony Trinitron no less, as deep as is was wide. I will never forget the Wembley turf as it crackled into Technicolor view, an unearthly magical green. Then the strips – that Arsenal yellow a blur of golden sulphur, a colour etched into my psyche forever.

We all know how the game unfolded – and like many my lifelong love affair with Arsenal was cemented in those dying minutes. But looking back, as Alan Sunderland celebrated his winning goal, there is one thing I don’t thank that new TV for – the sight of all those bubble perms, moustaches and Gary Bailey’s mullet in full colour…

Jem Packer

790 Responses to “FA Cup final run in starts here…”

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  1. Ashwin Gunner

    We are being linked with Aurier , (who looks more of a possibiltiy)
    Benzema ( i have my doubts on this deal. Arsene wont move unitl UCL final, after which he will have the World cup excuse. )
    Di Maria (This is old. dont; believe in it anymore).

  2. MidwestGun

    Apparently we are linked with Schneiderlin too for £17 mill.
    Nothing wrong with transfer porn as long it’s for entertainment only and
    you don’t get addicted. Lol.

  3. bergkamplegend

    “Nothing wrong with transfer porn as long it’s for entertainment only and
    you don’t get addicted. Lol.”

    Very true!! lol
    Wenger wants him just because Deschamps called him in France squad, pathetic isn’t it ?? lol

  4. bergkamplegend

    OMG, don’t you realize that Pedro has told to Le Senile One that it was THE summer or never for buy big names, and wenger has shoots him between the eyes!! LOL

  5. Bamford13

    No idea why anyone would get their hopes up about new signings at this point in Wenger’s reign. He is not going to do anything useful. That’s guaranteed.

    Transfer porn — I like this phrase — might’ve been stimulating two summers ago, or last summer, but now it does nothing for me. It’s all clearly just a tease.

  6. Al

    The last few days have felt like the calm before the storm.

    Nerves already kicking in. …can’t imagine what it will be like on Saturday. …can’t even imagine what it will be like after the first 30mins especially if we haven’t scored

  7. Emiratesstroller

    Rocky Pires

    You can forget Coleman and Aberloa at full back. Cost too much. Aurier is probably only option, which is why I made point that we should move quickly.

    Many of the holding/defensive midfielders you mention are not top quality or too old. We need someone who is in prime and will fit in. For a start I would not take Song back, because he is far too attack minded and used to leave defence exposed. Another problem is that you mention 2 Southampton players.
    This is in addition to all the other players in their squad who are in demand. Do you think that Southampton are going to offload more than one or two players?

    I don’t think that most of the goalkeepers you list would come to Arsenal because they will expect regular first team football and will cost too much either
    in transfer fee and/ or wages. If Arsenal bring in a UK based goalkeeper it will
    be someone like Marshall who like Stekenberg is with relegation team, but will cost less.

  8. bergkamplegend

    Arsenal signings this summer == >> Benzema + DiMaria + Casillas.

    Bankrupt at the Emirates LOL

  9. N5

    A1 I fully agree mate, I feel so confident about winning that if we now go on to do a Birmingham I will be destroyed!! I’m so sick of disappointment where Arsenal are concerned.

  10. bergkamplegend

    With Özil, Ramsey, Poldi, Per, Kos and co, it’s almost impossible to think of a defeat on saturday.
    But the problem is that there will be a huge pressure on us, and Hull is fully aware of that fact.
    “The fear to fail”, like wenger already said not so long ago…

    The best way to win is to score early, and most important, first.

  11. N5

    Legend, we need to do what we did to hull 3 weeks ago, they never looked like scoring that week.

    Kill the game off quickly and enjoy it.

    Either way I’m going to get drunk and have fun at Wembley.

    WHAT DID SHE WEAR?

  12. Vintage Gun

    “Then I was like, no. Fuck it. Getting so close to Boro Priromac I can touch him?”

    He’s an illusion Pedro, a hologram at best. Just like Dick Law.

  13. MidwestGun

    SHE SAID IT’S FOR THE ARSENAL AND WE’RE GOING TO WEMBELY

    WEMBELEEYYYY WEMBELEEYYYY WE’RE THE FAMOUS ARSENAL AND WE’RE GOING TO WEMBELEYYYY

    Thanks Kwik. 😉

  14. TitsMcgee

    David Ornstein ‏@bbcsport_david 54m
    Understand Van Gaal has agreed 3yr deal to become #mufc manager, with Giggs assistant. Club refusing to confirm/deny:

  15. TitsMcgee

    BBC Sport ‏@BBCSport 1h
    Spain midfielder Thiago Alcantara is ruled out of the World Cup after a setback in his recovery from a knee injury pic.twitter.com/3YrXMmqfjy

  16. Al

    midwest

    if that happens something is definitely breaking in my house. Going to have everything i don’t mind breaking as close as possible so i don’t break something i want/need

  17. N5

    SHE WORE, SHE WORE, SHE WORE A YELLOW RIBBON
    SHE WORE A YELLOW RIBBON, IN THE MERRY MONTH OF MAY
    AND WHEN I ASKED HER WHY SHE WORE THAT RIBBON
    SHE SAID ITS FOR THE ARSENAL WHEN THEY GO TO WEMBERLEEEEYY

    WEMBERLEEEEYY, WEMBERLEEEEY, WE’RE THE FAMOUS ARSENAL AND WE’RE GOING TO WEMBERLEEEEY.

    WEMBERLEEEEYY, WEMBERLEEEEY, WE’RE THE FAMOUS ARSENAL AND WE’RE GOING TO WEMBERLEEEEY.

  18. tunnygriffboy

    N5

    I’m in a state of high anxiety already. I don’t think I’ll be able to enjoy it. It’s huge for the fans and the players especially the young ones, proof they can win. Great for senior members like Arteta and Rosicky who’ve won nothing. Boost for Ozil as well, bought to help win us a trophy, a win would give him confidence.

    4 nil up first 15 mins will help me relax. Just hope we don’t want it too much and tighten. Likes of Per, Sagna and Arteta be important.

  19. bergkamplegend

    “Then I was like, no. Fuck it. Getting so close to Boro Priromac I can touch him?”

    I don’t understand why Pedro was in this state.
    This was not katy perry…

  20. N5

    Tunny, that’s exactly the same for me mate. It’s Thursday and I’m already a nervous wreck. I keep bursting into song at work and getting looked at oddly. My boss has jumped twice at Wembley, Wembley! but luckily they are a gooner too, so they feel my anxiety.

  21. Ashwin Gunner

    So this is what happened

    Pedro: Why didn;t you buy strikers last summer
    Arsene : We were in active in market. There were no quality players available.
    Pedro : Why does Arsenal top the injury list every season.
    Arsene : We were unlucky with injuries. (Arsene getting irritated).
    Pedro : Is Sagna signing a new deal
    Arsene : Ball is in his court. Why are you looking at me???
    Pedro : Last question. When are you going to sell Diaby
    Arsene gets up and punches Pedro on his nose.

  22. N5

    GoB, he’s only on loan at Chelsea anyway isn’t he?

    Maureen has been consistantly rude to his strikers all season.