Is it weird?
Well it might be?
Ok, I’ll run it by you… I don’t speak German unless in the company of female Germans. But jeez, I was watching this video yesterday and I was mesmerised.
It’s just Guardiola, training his team in Doha, talking German. Incredible. What an animal. He’s talking to Lahm, one of the greatest players on the planet, like a school kid. At one point he shouts,
‘It happens every f*cking game!’
German speaking Spaniard, bad language and top class football training. So good. It’s the sporting equivalent hardcore porn. You know, the type when the counter is on single figures.
Again, not that I see training sessions with Arsene, but I can’t imagine they’re loaded with as much energy, teaching and passion as that. Pep is a beast, he’s inspirational, you want to go along with him and you wouldn’t dare question him. Pep does his analysis with the players off the pitch then he gets them out on the field and drills them. They went out last night and pushed through to the next round overturning United. Not the best achievement ever, but clinical. He’s overseeing a pretty incredible Bayern side that could possibly retain the Champions League. A massive achievement. You know what I like about him? Bar everything.
He’s not resting on his laurels, he’s championing a further 30% improvement next year.
30% improvement on what he has! Imagine that. Imagine Arsene saying that? Pep thinks he can add 30% more to the best squad in Europe. Arsene doesn’t think he can improve a beasted squad with one striker in January. Well, that’s a damn lie, he added a player with a broken back.!
Such jokes. Such soul destroying jokes…
Anyway, more stuff creeping out the club, Matt Law has indicated some sections of the squad believe that more preparation before a game would help us.
That’s a very nice way of putting it. Backs what I’ve been saying though.
An interesting parallel came from David Hillier a few weeks ago. He said the George Graham used to come back from watching Ajax train and he’d have visions of how Arsenal could copy them. I’d imagine that a comment that might have come out of Georges squad might have been…
‘Some of the players think it might be a good idea to take hamburgers off the menu and stop getting shitfaced before games’
A nice way of putting it. But here’s the thing, George, like Arsene, was too stuck in his ways to make the changes. We kicked out George, made a mistake with Rioch, then brought in Wenger. He brought us inline with Europe and had an instant impact. Better training, better diet and better players.
Move Arsene on, bring in better fitness, better pre and post match analysis and bring in, ironically, better players… and you’re bloody laughing.
‘BUT LOOK AT MOYES’
I think people forget that Manchester United were replacing the best manager in the world. Not only the best manager, the best backroom team. Moyes came in, wiped it out and put in something substandard.
At Arsenal, we’d be clearing out an ageing backroom team that hasn’t delivered for ten years. I’m not suggesting we wipe out everyone, but certainly take the ‘freshen up’ stick to the stagnant areas.
Scouting, keeping, analysis (I joke, we don’t have analysis!), I’m moving on Boro and I’m getting me a new fitness guy. Fresh, qualified, hungry blood… it’ll be awesome.
Jokes aside, I really do think Wenger is going to sack it in. How can the manager sign up to a new deal with feelings as low as now? If he didn’t want to pen the deal during the 126 days we’ve been top this season, he sure as hell isn’t going to when journos are asking him about his replacement in interviews.
All the signs point to him moving on. The body language, the performances, the lack of hunger to win and obviously the standard Groundhog Day capitulation.
You’d like to think, that Ivan, being a man of the long term planning vision, is looking at new managers right now. No contract signed, manager underperforming, getting spanked by everyone. Surely the feelers are out in case the worst happens? I think big businesses call it succession planning. If not, fear not Ivan, I’m here to give you a list you can work on now.
I’ll live to regret this in 2 years time when 3 of them are destitute selling their bodies for 20 packs of Lambert and Butler.
Hot right now list:
1. Martinez: Highly rated in the game with a football strategy likened to ‘guerilla football’. Has a vision of how the game should be played, is extremely likeable, can work to a budget as well as being deeply analytical. He’s superb with the press and the players seem to adore him. Taking Baines over to Germany to watch Phillipe Lahm shows you the sort of creativity you’re dealing with. Ambitious, hungry to take his career to the next level. Could be a very good fit.
2. Jurgen Klopp: A monster of a manager. Charismatic charmer one minute, fearsome warrior the next. 46 years old and part of the new generation of intellectual managers. Excellent approach to digging out talent, supremely technical as well as a born winner. This man doesn’t sit there with a broken squad and a £140m in the bank. He’s about the glory. But he’s about glory and style. Players die for him on the pitch. Question marks over the ego he has and obviously, he’s never worked in the Premier League. A back to back Bundasliga winner and a Champions League finalist on a wage bill smaller than QPRs. Nuff said blud.
3. Steve Bould: Stop, stop… I can’t bare the flak I get for this. Make the disagreement stop and listen to me. I don’t think it’d be too dim an idea to give one of our legendary centre backs a crack at the whip. He’s been understudying for two seasons, he’d sorted out backline initially, before everything that sits in front of the defence broke. You have the perfect blend as far as I’m concerned. A man who knows what a drilled defence is all about… as well as what kamikaze attack is all about. Get a nice balance there and you could have something quite special. The players like him, he’s 51 years old, he has red blood… no wait… red and white blood? He’s the sort of punt Barca took on Pep when he was the B team coach.
4. Mauricio Pochettino: The eye gouger from Argentina came into the Premier League on press crescendo of ‘WHO IS THIS MAN REPLACING A PROPER ENGLISH GEEZER’… did he care? No. Why? Because if he doesn’t care enough to speak English to the press despite speaking it well, he sure as hell isn’t going to bother himself what they think about replacing Nigel Adkins. He’s quietly gone about his business. He saved Southampton from the drop and built from there. Sure, Southampton have a great infrastructure behind the scenes and sure, he’s spent some cash. But he has Southampton competing as a genuinely top team. They play a powerful brand of exciting pretty football. The Argentinian is tactically on point. The key thing I like about him is his ability to nurture precocious youth talent. One to watch. One to watch indeed.
5. Thomas Tuchel: Now, I only know about this guy because Rapha Honigstein has high praise for his work on the BT European show. However, now I’ve made myself and expert on his life and journey and I love this guy. He took over Mainz back in 2009. He doesn’t have an incredible playing career, but he fundamentally understands people and what drives them. Go beyond that and he’s a master of the game as well. A real trailblazer. Apparently, the first thing he did when he tookover was take his players to a retreat to get to know them better. He noticed that at meal times, everyone ate at different times. There was no respect, no camaraderie. So he set about improving the manners of the squad to build unity. Then when you dig into his training methodology, it’s really interesting. His sides train on rhombus shaped pitches to cut out long ball passing. He has a great record against Bayern as well (as well as being tipped to manage them one day). He’s a clever guy who put strategy at core. I love this style of manager. Deep thinkers. Football is changing and the clever guy is winning. An amazing transformation over the course of the last 5 years.
Anyway, like I’ve been saying all year. Don’t fear change. Fear stagnation. Fear more of the same. Fear a lack of ambition. But don’t fear change, because it’s the only way this club will ever make it back to the top.
Which I can promise you will happen.
ADIOS meine besten freunde in der internetz
P.S. Chambo injured in training. What was I saying the other day? Our manager is a joke.