Good morning Grovers, I hope you’re well on this sunny day. Speaking of which, if anyone works at a product development lab for a deodorant firm, how about you stop thinking of ways you can keep people smelling fresh for longer and longer periods (if you’re not washing for 72 hours, you’ve got a problem) and you develop a mix that doesn’t decimate white shirts in a few months.
Anyway, that’s really a question for my product development blog. Today, we’re here to talk about Arsenal. This is after all an Arsenal blog.
Straight into it. Robin Van Persie rolled into work yesterday to face the music. That music will have been Wenger singing an East 17 cover of ‘stay now’ on an acoustic guitar (this is where Wenger snatched the chords from).
Or is he?
When I spoke to my contact of tea room persuasion earlier in the summer, she intimated that Wenger will know what he wants to offer and he’ll be basing that on history as much as anything. Maybe we’re not pushing the boundaries because this decision on Robin is based on more than just emotion. A £180k a week contract will not look good if you’re only getting 60 games over 3 seasons. I’m struggling to believe a manager who booted, Vieira, Gilberto, Pires and Thierry Henry out when they hit 29 is going to look at a player who hasn’t offered us half the games and bust out the special contract (you know, like the one he gave to Thierry in his final season).
It’s interesting that some of the newspapers are now talking about Robin favouring a move over to Juventus. I wouldn’t be against that if I’m honest. He can fade off into obscurity in a league that I’m hoping to buy once you lot start clicking the damn adverts.
I’ve lost interest in him as a player. As far as I’m concerned, he’s dead to me. I’ll always love him for what he did for us last season, but right now, he’s pulled the, ‘I’ll always love you,but I’m not in love with you’ card.
Screw you Robin… screw you and your lame excuses and your lack of commitment to true love.
A clubs spokeman said this…
‘Robin returned to training on Monday as expected and made it clear he wants to sit down and resolve the matter of his future, either way, as soon as possible. No date has yet been agreed for that meeting.’
Our whole summer has been about f*cking meetings. Get it over with. Do a google hangout if you have to. Stop procrastingating and make a decision.
In other news, this Niang chap who we had on trial seems to be courting quite a lot of attention from other clubs. Apparently his fee could go as high as £6million. Manchester City are rumoured to be interested in him. Their scouting method appears to be tracking tracking Grimantubes Youtube account and making moves based on what he’s looking at. This guy is only 17, but he’s French and he has a mowhawk hair cut. He must be good right?
I’m also sure the local gangster wannabes from my hometown used to use the word nang to denote something they found sh*t hot. Things are looking good. Very good.
The Times are linking us with a move for Paulinho. He’s a creative midfielder for Corinthians and his stats point to a man who spend large parts of last season benched… or more likely… injured. If it’s the latter, I can’t rule out a move for him. Also, it makes sense that if Ganso is the most exciting name in Brazil outside Neymar, we’d move for Paulinho (actually the pseudonym of one of the Grovers). The Times reckons we’ve made a £9mill bid, Wikipedia reckons he’s known for his extreme mental toughness. You can’t help but feel a cheeky Arsenal fan has had an involvement there!
Two more stories to go…
Theo Walcott is set to sit down for crunch talks with Arsenal. Crunch reminds me of a product idea I had for Kellogs during the recession… I proposed they brought out a line of cereal call ‘Credit Crunch’. Anyway, back to the story. Theo wants a load of money we’re not going to pay him. Will Liverpool? I doubt it. Are they a step up? Absolutely not. If you’re not a great player is there a better place to be than Arsenal? Doubtful. Theo, do what’s right for your career, not what’s right for your wallet. You’ll become a far more accomplished player with us.
It’s up to you though… I’m not going to lose any sleep if you do decided the grass is greener (it’s never greener than the Emirates hence all the awards).
Last story is one that’s been milling around for ages. Apparenlty we’re sniffing around Lewis Holtby, the German midfielder.
He has one year left on his deal with Schalke and we might want to take him onbaord as we don’t have enought blonde players to have the right balance in team photos.
[twitter-follow screen_name=’LeGrove’ show_count=’yes’]
That’s all I have for you today. See you in the comments!