There are loans and there are loans. Let’s look at Arsenal’s…

by & filed under Uncategorized.

First of all let’s talk about our loans, the biggest one is for the stadium and this one was necessary in order to bring in the income to make our team the best in the world of football. The downside is it seems we have to pay for it first. So this is a long term loan and an even longer term payback.

The next one is the players we loaned, the first was Yossi Benayoun, we got him from Chelsea to add strength and experience to our squad, him I’m not so sure about because he can’t seem to get a game, reasonable player but a little surplus to our needs.

Thierry Henry was a sop to the disgruntled fans, sure he was a legend, but it really shows how bad Chamakh is because Henry is scoring, and how completely useless Park is because our stop-gap 34 year old loanee is getting games over him.

Still he is Korean and buying him in theory reduces our loan, the first one that is.

Make no mistake though, Henry was a cynical ploy to disguise the fact Wenger was not going to buy a proper goalscorer in the window, quite shameless really, but that’s our Arsenal these days.

Then there are some of the players we have loaned out, Bothelo, Galindo, Bartley, Lansbury, Ryo, Campbell and Wellington, them I can understand as they are gaining experience or because of permit issues, but players like Vela, Bendtner and Denilson I don’t because they are clearly not wanted by Arsenal and we couldn’t sell them (and we tried), so why don’t we just tell them to leave when their contracts expire?

So without sounding negative, if we added that lot to the players that would never make the team like Squillaci and Park, players that are just not good enough like Chamakh and perma-crocks like Diaby, I wonder how much money we could save in salaries and how much money we would get in fees for them.

Unless of course there is some super clever reason we have these players out on loan that I don’t know about?

People were moaning about Steven Hester, the RBS boss and his bonus, but he runs a bank and earns less than Diaby who doesn’t even play. (They both have something in common though, they both work for banks)

Finally why has Almunia still got the number 1 squad number when he is only our current number 3, and he hasn’t been near our first team for over a year, in fact he was even a loanee this season.

It’s like our manager can’t bear to part with some of his favourite players. And someone needs to explain to my why we just extended the contract of Johan Djourou, nice bloke, not a bad centerback back up, but he is what, 6th choice? And we all now how good he is as a full back back up, don’t we.

Anyway the good news is we have Gibbs back in contention and Jenkinson returns to training next week. So if Gibbs can slot in to the left back spot and last more than his customary 17 minutes, then we look to be close to having a good team to put out for the important next few weeks.

The bad news is Chamakh is fit again so unless something happened to him in Africa, then we can expect to see him getting in the way of any goalscoring opportunities that come our way. Hey, he may go back to that player we had for a month last season, who knows, I sure hope so because we have no other options.

The next 2 weeks will make or break our season, this Saturday is a massive game for us, a win is essential.

I just hope that Gibbs has been doing what Sagna has in his time off, watching the team from the stands and learning how to defend, he is great at going forward, but not so good at staying back, so we can only hope.

I think if we play a forward three of Robin Theo and Oxo, they will be terrified, if we put Rosicky in the midfield instead of Ramsey, I think the passage of play will be too quick for them, that’s not to diss Ramsey, I really like him, he needs a breather though, so this is my team for tomorrow.


Sagna Kozzer Vermaelen Gibbs

Coquelin Arteta Rosicky

Theo Robin Oxo

I would put Coquelin in the midfield and rest Song, Gibbs straight in at left back and Vermaelen in for Mertesacker who I would also rest, this team has pace and the game I saw at Middlesbrough midweek showed me that pace is what will do for them.

I would be sorely tempted to put Arshavin in the middle and rest Robin as well but I can’t see him doing that, if he rested Robin he would use Chamakh, shame really because I think we would see the best of Arshavin running through the middle, almost in the hole behind Theo and Oxo.

No, that’s way too daring for Arsene, but with Milan and Sunderland coming straight after Sunderland he’ll have to mix it up.

Don’t read that last line after a few Cervesas, it was difficult enough to write!

Have a top and fun filled Friday Grovers, Pedro will return from Ireland to write a bumper pre-match post mañana!

363 Responses to “There are loans and there are loans. Let’s look at Arsenal’s…”

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  1. dennisdamenace

    Morning Geoffrey, Wenger still here then…..

    Still can’t expect an intelligent man on £7m+ a year to walk can you….

  2. dennisdamenace

    Oh, and as for that fraudulent cunt Redknapp, i want to see him fail spectacularly, crash and burn like the overrated cunt he is……
    Then, maybe then, the press will stop creeping up his flatulent fucking arse.

  3. dennisdamenace

    I saw a poor old lady fall unconcious in the snow today….
    Well i’m assuming she was poor, she only had 86p in her purse!!!

  4. dennisdamenace

    Following the recent media frenzy, John Terry says there is only one obvious candidate for the next England manager.A man who shares his beliefs, will clean up the squad and make his country great again.Ron Atkinson.

  5. northern Gooner

    Re Djourou: You explained the contract signing perfectly yourself Geoff: he is not a bad CB. You are moaning about squad numbers, so having a “not bad CB” as 6th Choice must be a good thing? And what is the problem of lending out players (Bentner, Vela and Denilson) we can’t sell (as nobody have money yo buy them). Why have them at the club if they are not wanted? Loaning them out might just mean we can sell them later if they play ok?

  6. dennisdamenace

    You all know where exactly all our guaranteed percentage of revenues into the playing goes………
    Into increased/improved contracts for the dross already at the club.
    Why spend that money on improving the squad and giving players like LJW and RvP someone decent to play alongside or instead of when you can continually rewards walking fuckups like Djourou and Diaby….

  7. dennisdamenace

    Sorry Geoff, but you’ve got more chance of Wenger buying Hazard than you have of him dropping/resting his favourite lumbering bullock….

  8. hitman49

    Make sure you get the Correct Insurance for the sex you are having.
    Please find a list of companies below catering for most tastes:

    Sex with your wife – Legal & General.

    Sex on the telephone – Direct Line.

    Sex with your Partner – Standard Life.

    Sex with someone Different – Go Compare.

    Sex with a Fat bird – More Than.

    Sex On the back seat of a car – Sheila’s Wheels.

    Sex with a posh bird – Privileged.

    Sex with an OAP – Saga !

  9. Bush Gooner

    Redknapp only won a FA cup and UEFA Intertoto Mickey Mouse Cup in1999 and now being hailed as a great manager?

    Why do we thrive on mediocracy !

  10. drona

    It is sad Geoff when you compare a banker to a footballer. I don’t know the specific facts of the banker in question, but if he was an employee of the bank that was the recepient of the billions doled out by your Government then the taxpayer has every right to begrudge his bonus.

  11. hitman49

    Harry Redknapp has reported Roberto Mancini to the FA after Mancini waved an imaginary tax return at him.

    Fair play to Harry Redknapp: I can’t even get our dog to sit and beg, let alone go and open an off-shore bank account.

  12. tippitappi

    He won’t rest song and your right arsh down the middle ? far too radical for our arsen mass changes in tha cup match as he chases his shadow for 4th spot he’s a just a crazy man

  13. Louis'zino Mugbeh

    Nice post….but I disagree with you on Ramsey…..he is beginning to show that perhaps he isnt as ready for the first team as u guys have made him look……He makes good run upfront and converts nothing….while in defence he loses the ball quite too often….

  14. nuudles

    I think the majority of the rotation will happen for the FA cup game. The boys had a week’s rest, so I can see him playing RvP against both Sunderland & Milan and then resting him for the FA cup game.

    I agree completely that Ramsey needs to be rested.

    Would be interesting to see how much weight Arsene puts into the CL vs the league. I know he said league is priority but in his heart I think he prizes the CL as the biggest one to win and that is why he says finishing top 4 is a trophy.

    Someone needs to give Kevin Prince Boateng’s girlfriend some oysters or something so that she can break him again before we square off to Milan next week (as she admitted that is the source of his injuries…).

    I think we might get away with playing the following squad in preparation for the Milan game:
    _____le coq_arteta______

    I would even be tempted to give Yossi a run in Arteta’s role but Arteta provides us with so much solidity that he is very valuable in the midfield. Sunderland played a lot of football latelky, they are lacking in depth in crucial areas so that team should be able to beat them. I know that not playing RvP & Oxo is a risk as they are our most dangerous players. I also think Kozzer should be rested as he has looked slightly off the pace lately and it is probably down to too many games.

    That would leave us with fresh players for Milan so we can line up as follows:
    ________ramsey(or rosicky)_

    Ramsey needs to keep the pace high as we often grind to a halt when he gets the ball…

  15. Bade

    So then,

    Johan’s extension show, yet again, how twisted Arsene’s priorities are

    Johan is a nice bloke indeed, but as a footballer he ain’t what we need

    He can’t play fullback, and as a CB we have much better options so no actual room for him

    With Miquel and Bartley I think we should sell him.

    Sorry didn’t mention Squillaci, but this one is already obvious, even to Arsene (and still you have to wonder why did he get that pay rise?)

  16. Eddie Mcgoldick

    3 point easy this saturday the game will be won in the first 45 mins. with van p oxo and kosicelny all on the score sheet. then wenger will take them 3 off resting them for MILAN baby.

    Come on you GOOOOOOOONERS

  17. Bade

    Tomorrow’s game is massive massive one

    In a week where our opponents clashing between them, we have to take advantage and win our game, albeit Sunderland away never an easy game, especially when you’r looking at our last few visits there, and they’re recent form
    (winning 5 of their last 6 games, 3 wins in a row now, and through to the next round in the FA cup)

    Maybe that extended replay against Boro would affect them. Hopefully so at least

  18. dennisdamenace

    Hmmmm, actually yes, has anyone ever seen Pedro AND Gambon in the room at the same time????
    They are the Michael and Janet Jackson of Le Grove……

  19. Ricky

    I don’t dislike the way our clubs being run, I fucking hate it!!

    Worse run football club in the country.. Handing out contracts to dead-fuckin-wood like djourou?!

    Disgrace.. & to think we pay £7m a year for this disgrace.

  20. Norgun

    Another question, assuming the board does the right thing and fires Wenger, WHO should find the new manager? Kroenke,/Gazidis sure as hell ain’t capable. And the rest of the board is either senile or a banker. No football men left at Arsenal…

  21. gambon

    Bush Gooner

    Took Spurs from relegation zome to champions league.

    Now has them in 3rd place with a wage bill FAR below Arsenal, Liverpool, Chelsea.

  22. Ricky

    “No football men left at Arsenal…”

    Agreed!! They all need to go together or it’s gonna be more drama….

    I could see them cunts going & getting someone like ranieri FFS!

  23. nuudles

    bade, agree, but that is why I might be tempted to rest him as we SHOULD be able to beat Sunderland. Or if we are 1 or 2 up with 30-35 mins to go he would be the first player I would take off (if Song started then put Le Coq or Yossi on in Arteta’s place). We still have a good shot of finishing 4th so I might be tempted to start Henry, that said if Theo plays like against Blackburn then we can start Henry as he should be able to score at least 2 of RvP’s 3 goals. His pace has dropped but he still knows where to be when in the box, RvP’s goals against Blackburn was just sublime positioning.

  24. R,S.P.C.Arsenal

    good read… well thought ourt, i agree the pace will do sunderland, lets break that o’neill bubble! hopefully they will be a bit knackered!

  25. Bade

    I would priorities the league and the FA over the CL

    No way we’re going to win the CL with Bayern, Real, Barca, $ity and the Mancs still in it ……..

    Oh wait, the two Manchesters are out of it 🙂

    Still no practical chance to win it

  26. IG

    Why the fuck did Wenger extend Djourou’s contract ?? Its official then…. Arsenal will sell players like Cesc & Nasri and probably RVP soon and extend contracts for a player who can only be considered suitable for first division football…. Wenger makes my blood boil!!

  27. Bade

    I’d play this side


    Then I’d rest Sagna and Tommy first, if possible at some point

  28. Danny

    A Martian couple and an Earthling couple have met and are talking about
    all sorts of things. Finally, the subject of sex comes up.

    “Just how do you guys do it?” asked the Earthling.

    “Pretty much the way you do,” responded the Martian.

    Discussion ensues and finally the couples decide to swap partners for
    the night and experience one another. The female Earthling and the male
    Martian go off to a bedroom where the Martian strips. He’s got only a
    teeny, weeny member; very short and very narrow.

    “What can you do with THAT!?” exclaims the woman.

    “Why?” he asked, “What’s the matter?”

    “Well,” she replied, “it’s nowhere near long enough. It’ll never reach!”

    “No problem,” he said and proceeded to slap his forehead with his palm.
    With each slap of his forehead, his member grew until it was quite
    impressively long. “Well,” she said. “That’s quite impressive, but it’s still
    pretty narrow.”

    “No problem,” he said again and started pulling his ears. With each pull
    his member grew wider and wider until the entire measurement was
    extremely exciting to the woman.

    “Wow!” she exclaimed as they fell into bed and made mad, passionate
    love. The next day the couples rejoined their normal partners and went
    off together.

    As they walked along the Earthling male said, “Well, was it any good?”

    “I hate to say it,” she said, “but it was really wonderful. How about you?”

    “Well,” he said, “It was the weirdest thing. She kept slapping me on the
    forehead and pulling my ears all night.”

  29. Mykelgunner

    Woooooohoooo! It’s joke friday.

    My joke line-up:


  30. James Taunt

    Geoff, that lineup of yours is highly unlikely. Song will play over Coq. Arshavin might play on the wings but I suspect he will be subbed at half time because of another subpar display. I think Wenger has had enough of Arshavin and these next few games with be Arshavin’s last.

  31. Matchy


    The champion league is the league that makes you a global super club.

    Arsenal without the 15 years champion league participation would not be the club they are on the world stage. Arsenal was just at best a mid table club compares to liverpool, man city in the league.

    for the last ten years and historically the club that were able to win the league are when the owner inject funds into the clubs.

    Chelsea. funds injection by the owner.

    Man United since the take over they were in a way ‘financed’ through ‘geoff’ favourite men ‘BANKERS’ and put money into the club and took it out at the same time.

    They you get recent attempts from clubs such as Liverpool when owner injected moneis in last year.

    Spurs through virgin island ‘bankers’ invisible funds

    Aston Villa injection of funds from its onwers

    Sunderland injection of funds by its owners

    And even STOKE CITY.

    Arsenal is the only club where its owner has not put money into the club to acquire players for improvement.

  32. Jimmythegun

    Mornin’ everyone,

    Just getting my apologies in early – I’m off to the game tomorrow – been to a fair few over the last few years and we’ve never won, almost took Rosicky’s missed peno in the face last year, was up in the gods when Paddy got sent off and Niall Quinn scored late on.

    So don’t blame Arsene, Theo, the defence, the balance sheet or the handbrake if we don’t come back with 3 point tomorrow.

    It’ll be my fault entirely.

  33. Danny

    Anybody can be arsed today to choice Arsenal’s all time worst players? Besides of course Francis Jeffers, Richard Wright, Clive Allen, Almunia, Chamakh, Park etc

  34. R,S.P.C.Arsenal

    i have not changed my mind, finishing out of europe would be best for the long term ‘football’ of arsenal it may derail the banks out look… tho…

  35. wenger-numb

    djourou has another 3-year contract??????…this is the work of a madman surely.
    Vela has said he doesnt want to return to arsenal!…..for me vela is a real footballer that with the right manager could be a 20 goal a season striker. Arsenal are a joke club now…with piss-takers in the boardroom and a clown as a manager

  36. LiLJackDub

    Referring to this club as “our” Arsenal might be the biggest laugher on joke Friday. This is clearly Arsene’s Gunners to do whatever he wishes. That includes running the entire franchise into the ground to prove a useless point as well obviously. He’s clearly not interested in appeasing the fans, that for sure.

  37. Mwangi Samuel

    I have a feeling Diaby will do an ‘RVP’. Just when we get tired of his injuries, he will turn up on fire and then we will be worried of him leaving. The potential is there, the only problem is his attitude and injuries. But by reading the trend in the midfield (ramsey, arteta, wilshere, conquelin, song, frimpong, etc) he knows he has to work hard or otherwise he will be a forgotten man. May be that will spur (not the scums) him to take any opportunity he gets with seriousness. Otherwise, he can fuck off back to france.

  38. hitman49

    here is somthing to think about..
    if the club are letting the mad frenchie renew contracts what does that tell you.?
    answers on a post card address to
    got the suckers again they reall are thick.
    .thanks for the renewall

  39. AJ

    I heard Shaqiri agreed a pre-contract with Bayern Munich. What was wenger doing? 10 million is inside our limits, moreover he is under 21 I think and would have been a nice addition.

  40. zdzis

    OK, OK, so there we go again.
    Been playing FIFA 12?
    1. The secret loans of dr. Wenger
    a) Vela’s contract only runs out in 2015. Unless there’s a hot buyer, he might spend the rest of his Arsenal career on loans. That is, if he can’t just make himself use a shredder on his contract.
    b) Bendtner apprently expected calls from Barca, or at least Real , in the summer, and since there were none, he decided to earn some more pocket money. His contract runs out in 2014, and unless he decides it’s better to go himself, he’ll stay on Arsenal payroll.
    c) Denilson is also under contract until 2014, so he is in exactly the same situation as both players above.
    2. The squad players picture show:
    a) Squillaci looks like a future departure to me. He’s only a year left on his contract, so there’s a chance someone might want him. I guess he’d still do nice in France or Spain.
    b) Chamakh’s contract lasts until 2014, which makes him more of a deadweight, but, unlike Squillaci, he has something to fight for. Before Arsenal he was a regular international; he isn’t anymore – he’s called up, but doesn’t get to play.
    c) Diaby is a problem, cause Wenger seems to like him too much. I guess we’ll have to bear his presence at least until 2015.
    d) Park is a big question mark. He has an almost impeccable record as an international and in French Ligue 1, but seems to have a hard time finding his way about the EPL. It’s possible he might hand in a transfer request soon, if he hasn’t already.
    e) Djourou’s contract: it might sound strange to you (apparently) but teams usually need capable squad players. Djourou is quite reliable (though not above making some errors, obviously) and already well-versed in English game; plus he’s only 25. And I don’t know how much you drank while writing, but Djourou is actually the 4th choice centre-half right now and the 4th choice left-back. He also isn’t a fullback by trade, which kind of explains why he doesn’t do too well as one, doesn’t it? Sounds logical enough for you? Strange as it may sound, it wouldn’t do any team too good not to have any backup centre-halfs, and we’ve seen some of that in the more or less recent past.
    As for the Henry-Park-Chamakh business, I think if RVP is rested, we’ll rather see Henry start. Sadly, due to shocking mismanagement at the beginning of the season (which is probably a product of the change in ownership), Arsenal was uncapable of securing a potent backup striker. There were very (VERY) slim chances of capturing one in January, primarily due to the fact that few teams would release their key players in mid-season, and also that the best players were either going to the AFCON or preparing for the Euros. So unless you expected Wenger to land a Clint Dempsey (I wish you wouldn’t), no one in their right mind, knowing how this market operates, would think Arsenal could actually deal with their striker problem then. Another reason was, of course, the bill – with three strikers on it, it was probably hard to think of acquiring another one without guarantees that he would be capable of jumping the first XI already.
    One note about Arshavin: if we wanted him to play behind RVP, we’d have to switch to 4-4-2. Which won’t happen.

  41. Geoff

    I remember Diaby against Newcastle last season, man of the match, 4 nil up, then the twat gets sent off, he didn’t realise you can’t smack an opponent.

    That’s the problem.

  42. Thomas Rowlands

    good article, but off the head shout arshavin in the hole behind no main striker, that midge does not deserve to be anywhere near a starting slot, I would rather play theo centrally ( I would hate that option as well.)

  43. Kavit Patel

    speaking of FIFA 12:

    I had been scoring loads of goals with Gervinho recently, pick up the ball on the half-way line level with the right back, sprint past him all the way down the wing, cut into the penalty box leaving defender miles behind, find myself one on one with the keeper, and slot into the bottom corner.

    and guess what, Gerv did the exact same thing on wednesday night.

    See, FIFA 12 is THAT realistic it made Gerv do the same thing in real life…lol

  44. AC Gooner

    Anyone has the math on what we would save by ridding ourselves of those players?

    I always hear differing figures. Would also love to know when those contracts really expire.

    Here are my guesses. Appreciate any help.

    Vela 50k/wk 2014
    Bendtner 52k/wk 2014
    Denilson 55k/wk 2014
    Almunia 45k/wk 2012
    Arshavin 90k/wk 2013
    Squilachi 35k/wk 2013

  45. Mykelgunner

    What the hell is wrong with my arsenal?
    Dourou has extended his contract to 3yrs.
    Shitmack is back from the afcon.
    Almunia and squillaci still at the club
    Damn!!! Wenger still earns 7m..

  46. AC Gooner

    And, Geoff. Nice post and I like your choice of squad.

    Rosicky has been having a good run, lets keep him in there and rest Ramsey.

    Per can rest too and lets hope Gibbs gets through 90mins uninjured.

    Ox on board all the way, RVP to start, score two, then bring on the little Russian when the Sunders are tired to give him a little shot in the arm. A nice goal would do healing wonders for him. At about 63 mins Wengertime.

    Yossi on for the OX at 67. Clockwork Wenger.

  47. Lurch LeRouge

    Just saw this car advert in the local paper.

    Escort. Brown. Good condition. Reliable. A bit dirty but very cheap. Slight damage to the rear end.

    I rang the number and your mum answered.

  48. James Taunt

    AC Gooner

    Bring on the Russian when the Sunders are tired, eh?

    Whats that chap going to do? run circles around them. do you fancy

  49. Danny

    An elephant asked a camel,”Why are your breasts on your back?”

    “Well,” says the camel, “I think that’s a strange question from somebody whose wiener is on his face.

  50. Danny

    A farmer is lying in bed with his wife when he turns to her grabs her tits and says “Honey if you could get milk out of these we could sell the cow”.
    Then he grabs her pussy and says “Honey if you could get eggs out of here we could sell the chickens”.
    She turns to him smiles,grabs his dick and says “Honey if you could get this up I could get rid of your brother”

  51. 87gooner


    squillaci the real hard one to move hes on £50kpw

    Think howlmunia and denilson on £40k each, dont know about vela

    Bendtner and Arshavin correct

  52. Josip Skoblar

    Now we learn that Stuart Peace racially abused Paul Ince in 1994. Another fine FA mess…
    I saw Stuart Pearce in 2001 at a Sex Pistols concert in Crystal Palace. Pearce was pogoing madly next to me. He looked pretty scary and demented to me.

  53. Danny

    Last one (sorry gambon…..):
    What did one lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire?
    ”I’ll see you next month.”

  54. miki dora

    Has anyone thought about the worst possible lineup including everyone out on loan? Gosh, I’m excited thinking about it

  55. Eyeball Paul

    Josip Skoblar February 10, 2012 12:27:27

    Now we learn that Stuart Peace racially abused Paul Ince in 1994. Another fine FA mess…
    The FA must be even more stupid than they already appear if they thought that nobody would remember this.

  56. goonerDNA

    geoff you can say what you like about diaby but the fact he kicked terry in the face and tried to choke barton out, makes him a hero in my book plus he’s paid to do fuck all which is a dream of mine.

  57. incesc

    these journalists are so fecking useless!

    “It’s just common sense and logic that what goes out has to equal what comes in and if that doesn’t work the company loses money”

    why not point out and ask why the money going OUT never Equals that coming IN.


  58. sixx pac

    There once was a vampire called Mable. Whose periods were very unstable. Once every full moon, she took out a spoon and drank herself under the table.

  59. Lurch LeRouge

    There were some Eco warriors protesting outside the local council offices. They all had their “Save The Ancient Woodland” posters and banners. So I decided to go down there and take the piss.

    “Chop ’em all down, we need the logs!” I cried.

    “Go away, you monster!” one of the hippies shouted.

    “Seriously,” I laughed, “you know they’re going to do it so you’re wasting your time. What are they building anyway, a motorway? An airport?”

    “A mosque,” he replied.

    I’ve been protesting with them for three days now.

  60. Byo

    Of that lot you listed, I expect Ryo, Bartley and Campbell to come good. We have to sympathize with Diaby, the injuries are not his fault(consider the cloggers in the league).
    The rest(Denilson and co) I will agree are dead weight!

  61. Bade


    One last adjustment I’d humbly ask for in the comments section, is that when you click a link, the default option should be opening it in a new tab ….. as up until now if you click it instantly it opens in the same page and thus you’r out of the comments section effectively

  62. goonerDNA

    i’m not a doomer i’m just jealous of the cunt he gets to fuck female rappers his wife didn’t divorce him and he gets 7 million a year to fuck up and he gets praised for it and has whole websites dedicated to his values and die hard fans who lick his balls on a daily, what a life

  63. Azed

    February 10, 2012 12:51:37

    There once was a vampire called Mable. Whose periods were very unstable. Once every full moon, she took out a spoon and drank herself under the table.
    If this joke were to be a goal keeper, it would make Almunia look like Cassilas