Time to forget Wenger, his bizarreness and occasional fibbery, time to get the tissues out, it’s fantasy time!

by & filed under News Review.

Ok I have said all I need to say about Arsene Wenger and his inability to understand what the fan base actually want, namely a few decent players and the odd trophy.

And save stating the obvious that we should do a January swap deal with Real madrid for Jose Mourinhio which we clearly won’t, I want to talk today about what could happen should the ‘odd one’ luck out with this team, the returning players, a spud/chav collapse and if he’s involved in a massive smash up with the ‘abitofcommonsensejuggernaut’

So this is the team we could soon have lining up to pick up the points and win trophies.


Sagna Vermaelen Mertesacker/Kozzer Santos

Diaby Arteta Wilshere

Oxo RVP Gervinho

Bench of Theo, Ramsey, Song, Coquelin and Fabianski

Yes I left out Song for Diaby because with Jack and Arteta we would have a midfield that would and could swap around and be where they are needed, not to mention skill over lack of pace and fundamental absence of any footballing knowledge.

Also, it’s time to bench players if they aren’t pulling their weight, either because they aren’t good enough, aren’t good enough yet, or complacent because they have no competition. Either way we are neither a nursery nor an indulgence, time to man up and manage.

The back four pick themselves but Mertesacker, Kozzer and Vermaelen should be vying for the centre back role and not the full back fill in, with Santos and Sagna back we will be in good shape, with Yennaris and Gibbs as back up as I think Jenkinson has crock written all over him.

The forward line needs someone in it that can attack, cross and find the goal. If the manager thinks Oxo will get fatigued he should have saved himself Β£15mil or left him in the academy all season.

Now if he did something like that, dropped his hapless favourites and sold his sh!te signings Chamakh, Squillaci, Bendtner, Denilson, Djourou, Park, Almunia and Rosicky we would have the money to reduce season ticket prices, as we know that as long as he’s in charge we won’t buy a decent footballer.

For years Pedro and I were telling him to get rid of Eboue, Senderos and Denilson, he wouldn’t, he played them over and over and over again, he even made up stats for them! (most completed passes in the Premiership was a classic for spinning head) Then one day they slipped out of the door quietly and he said nothing, have we missed them? My ring piece we have!

All I’m saying is he will eventually get shot of the crap I mentioned so why not now?

Ok that was a bit of fantasy but as now the whole footballing world has realised our manager tells porkies, shifts the blame to whoever is nearest, doesn’t listen to his coaching or medical staff and has complete control over our board and football club, then I may as well move onto something else, being proved right eventually gets a bit boring, so I am now going to indulge my fantasies!

I would take Mourinhio, I really would, but Ancelotti would do, anyone would to be honest as long as it wasn’t Phil Brown, Sam Allardyce of anyone connected with Tottenham or David Beckham.

Bergkamp with Steve Bould would do it! There I go again, fantasising!

Barca/Madrid was funny last night, it took Cesc all of 4 months to turn into a nasty Spanish card waving at the ref tosser, way to go Cesc, I hope you feel at home. Who taught you that, or was it in your DNA?

Finally I watched Liverpool and Man City last night, not a kid amongst them, so what chance do we stand fielding them, it’s a waste of a cup the way we play it, good luck Cardiff!

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Have a great day Grover’s next up, Villa in the cup!

641 Responses to “Time to forget Wenger, his bizarreness and occasional fibbery, time to get the tissues out, it’s fantasy time!”

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  1. Lurch LeRouge

    its a fine service you provide Ivory,

    that conversation is what? 4 years old now? takes some stamina to regurgitate it all regularly!

  2. Va voom


    Its hard to stop reading when you agree with literally every sentence.

    Now my neck hurts from nodding my head for 5 minutes.

  3. flinky

    Szczesny/Schwarzer — Sagna/Wiel , Koscielny/Mertesacker , Vermaelen/Bartley , Santos/Gibbs — Song/Coquelin , Arteta/Ramsey , Wilshere/Rosicky — Chamberlain/Walcott , RvP/Podolski or M.Suarez , Gervinho/Hazard or Suarez
    nice idea πŸ™‚

  4. Lurch LeRouge

    yeah more pictures Ivory, insert mental caricatures – little vinyl toys chocking on bile do the trick, keeps the reader amused.

  5. IvoryGoonz

    I had more hopes in Eastmond than Yennaris, very similar players in positions, but I think Eastmond fits more the bill. primarily DM, but also RB, and I think he’d do better job than Djourou, or Djenkinson.
    Shame “we” let Nordtveit go. Shame

  6. IvoryGoonz

    I like the comment:
    “clairebear20 0 likes

    Oh my gosh I love the green flowery one! It’s gorgeous. Good for her for turning her life around πŸ™‚ ”
    lovely ain’t she? but she’s more been turned around by players than her turning her life around.

  7. Lurch LeRouge

    he had one or two decent CC performances Frenchie, while he was regular in the stiffs along side his peers, outside of that familiarity he looked lost.

  8. IvoryGoonz

    lol Lurch, was just wondering where was the case with Benzema and the likes…
    looks like she’s allowed to avoid French Police questions but do a catwalk in Paris. which I find quite revealing about the Paris Mayor.

  9. Gunner2301

    Guys Rosicky has improved in recent games…….. But only because he’ll have a year on his contract in the Summer and he wants a new one. πŸ™‚

  10. Lurch LeRouge

    cmon Ivory Paris is the city of original sin. sodom and gomorrah right through to the catacombs.

    she’s got carte blanch with everyone.

    she was smart, kept her mouth shut took the heat now anything she wants is bank rolled – shame she didn’t hire a decent designer to produce the kit.

  11. Z

    Sing him out

    How many times have we seen that at other grounds…. It works, the chances of him going is a long shot however it could just possibly make him react because theres nothing more important to him than a his massive ego being bruised on a weekly basis

  12. goonerDNA

    Lurch, isn’t Stan’s wife the daughter of the walmart co founder, not sure he has anything to do with walmart.

  13. Geoff

    Yes he married the Walmart heiress and built shopping centres for her to put knew ones in, that’s how he made his money.

  14. Evan

    The fucking catalina wine mixer

    Morning bitches, lets have a good weekend none of this underperforming crap, i want goals

  15. Fed


    yeah unfortunately you are correct. I would still try to sell them for whatever we could get but the odds wouldnt be very good πŸ˜€