Van Persie has babies injected in his foot.

by & filed under Uncategorized.

Like in a scene from a horror film sicko Robin Van Persie will have a placenta implant in his ankle performed at Frankenstein Castle in Serbia. His agent Brian Karloff, grandson of the legendary actor Boris has confirmed that his starlet is meeting with Dr Frankenstein’s assistant manager, Igor, in a bid to speed his recovery from his run in with ugly Italian centre back Giorgio Chiellini.

Frankly I don’t care if he had two youth players sewn into his foot as long as he’s back in our front line before Christmas, if that were to happen though, my guess is that we wouldn’t be buying another forward in the window, which of course would save project youth.

One thing that a number of you said yesterday is we didn’t need another forward, we needed a centre back and defensive midfielder before we need a forward, I sort of agree with that kind thinking, sort of.

Talk of Eduardo wanting out because of his lack of starts is complete bollocks, he’s had limited starts because he’s been injured, I expect Robin to be replaced by Eduardo, simple as that. Or he may switch Arshavin to the middle with Rosicky or Walcott on one side and Eduardo and Vela on the other.

He may even put Diaby in there, and although some of you are quaking with fear at that thought, I think that may be the answer against Sunderland, a bit of height.

As long as we don’t see Eboue re-appear on the right wing, I’ll be happy to see any new line up. I do have a question though Arsene, when you said having Rosicky and Eduardo back would be like having two new players, did you mean like having two new injured players? Because everytime Rosicky plays, he seems to miss the next four, is he Ledley King in disguise?

Don’t get me wrong, I love Rosicky, but blimey, when do we get to rely on him being in the team, you know, like Vermaelen or Gallas, if one of them were injured, we be in major league trouble.

It’s obvious that Senderos has no future, so why don’t you just sell him and get a replacement, or try him as a defensive midfielder, seeing him in the squad and getting paid makes me sad and pissed off at the same time, why have an expensive dud hanging around, it can’t be good for moral can it? And I don’t think he deserves that sort of treatment, he always did his best for us.

So just a few days to go to find out what the boss will do without the boy wonder, can we maintain our form and beat Sunderland and the chavs, I hope he has a plan, who would you pick?

Have a great day Grovers, four days and counting!

726 Responses to “Van Persie has babies injected in his foot.”

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  1. lesang

    i would have been first had i not read the post first and then googled to find out where the hell Frankenstein Castle was……tomorrow Sabeel

  2. finestcuts

    Diaby as second striker is not a prob.
    In games where we’d be looking to fire long shots more to gain a defensive edge, Bendtner and Diaby up front with Fabregas also playing deep up the pitch. Diaby may be better than Ramsey in the attacking midfielder role.

  3. SharkeySure

    Suga. Thanks again for that shout last week re the docu on VK. Just finished watching it last night….fucking brilliant !!!

  4. Lala Gunner

    WhaaaaT!!!!!SUGA3 are u nuts…We dont need Senderos nowhere near the team. he shud be shipped away in January…go play for Genoa, FC Basel, Olympiacos or some sorry team like that!period…the only players who can replace Song in the DM position are Inler, Toulalan, Yaya Toure, Essien and Daniele De Rossi

  5. finestcuts

    We would be awesome playing 4-5-1 in this formation:

    —————–Almunia

    —–Sagna———-Gallas——Vermaelen——-Gibbs

    ———————-Song/Denilson

    Rosicky—————————————Nasri

    —————-Fabregas————Arshavin

    ————————Eduardo

    Check out our 3 attacking players, that attacking 4-5-1 formation is the business against Sunderland.

  6. LadyGooner

    Is RVP having human or horse/cow placenta massaged into his ankle? There’s been conflicting reports in the media. Just curious, its very interesting/bizarre treatment…Hope it works!

  7. VanDaManPersie

    WTF is Adebayor’s problem? The guy just can’t seem to get over the fact that we let him to go a shitty team!!!

  8. mimi

    finest i like your formation but we would suffer defending setpieces.Height factor and all but in open play that formation might work.

  9. Aussie Az

    I love the opening paragraph to this blog, i didnt believe what i read on internet today but you guys just topped it off..well lets hope this out there treatment works

  10. choy

    Morning all…

    No need to change the positions…. just add eddie in place of rvp and nasri and rosicky to come in as well

  11. mimi

    Lady once its confirmed i am sure human/animal rights activists(in this case placenta activists) will be up on their arms defending their rights.

  12. gazzap

    Its all well and good keep repeating its best for Senderos to just go, but he cant go anywhere until Jan 1 no matter how many times you say it. leave it until the New Year.

  13. LadyGooner

    MIMI- LOL at placenta activists! But would human/animal rights people have much of a leg to stand? If its human placenta, what’s the big deal? People use umbilical cords for bone marrow etc, nobody’s been killed. And neither has animal, as you need to kill it to get the placenta, just collect the placenta (“after-birth”) after it gives birth. It does sound kinda gross though, lol

  14. rico

    Morning All, nice one Geoff..

    I am glad that Robin is nowhere near our medical staff, that I think will increase his chance of a speedy recovery. As soon as a Lewin goes near him, add an extra 4 weeks to his recovery time 😉

  15. bnsb

    Now that song and dance is made out of placenta treatment, let me share this.

    I had a bout of chicken pox in 2003. On the first day of diagnosis, my family physician prescribed one dose placenta extract (aptly branded Placentrex) manufactured by a french company and imported into India. He said it is not a medicine, it is harmless, but said first four days would be less painful and pox would not leave deep scar on face. It worked, less pain no scar.

    Incidentally I added word placebo effect to my vocabulary.

  16. gazzap

    A starting line up of something like:
    almunia
    Sagna Gallas Verm Gibbs
    Cesc Song Ramsey/Nasri
    Ros Eduardo Arsh

    Is still very strong. In fact its stronger than when Diaby and Eboue were in the team! (in fact Eboue probably still will be in wengers team).
    OK so the bench has become a little weaker, but as long as we dont pick up any more injuries and start getting players like Theo and Vela back then we will be fine.

    I think Wilshere and Bendtner are not far from fitness either.

    I would go with Rambo against Sunderland since I think he can handle himself a bit more than Nasri. thats if they make it through this week’s friendlies! Are there more friendlies?

  17. gazzap

    So England U21 play this afternoon at 4pm – be interesting to see where Gibbs plays.
    Then tomorrow, of the teams that contain Arsenal players looks like only Ivory Coast and Spain are playing friendlies – Poland too if you count Fabianski. So thats not too bad. Just hope Cesc does not play for Spain tomorrow.

  18. goonermichael

    Arsene Wenger is about to take a significant step towards learning if his unswerving faith in the controversial Eduardo is justified or misplaced.

    When you read something like that woy know the article is probably shit. Unswerving? controversial?

  19. Clacko the gooner

    Morning all.

    Gazzap, i agree with you there, especially the way he played against the Scottish at the weekend. He is meant to be out of their next game with a lower back injury though so not sure if he will be ready for the weekend, Same kinda goes for Diaby too. He didn’t play for France although he got called up because he has a calf injury. If they don’t get over those we could be short both height wise and players wise come the weekend.

  20. gazzap

    So playing in the qualifiers will be Arshavin, Gallas and Sagna. I dont think Nasri is in the squad, though I could be wrong.

  21. JoeBaker64

    Just in. I heard vP is using horse face placenta. Van Nistleroy has not been seen for 48 hours. Rumors abound of a Shergar style kidnaping.

  22. Doublegooner

    If Diaby played up front – can someone let him know there is a taser gun aimed at him which will fire if he isnt first to the ball with his head with instructions…
    IT MUST BE HEADED FORWARD TOWARDS THE OPPOSING GOAL !

  23. Jerseygooner

    Morning All,

    Nice post Geoff i agree with all you said there mate.

    Hate to admit it but i am worried about Sunderland this weekend. Bent will have a lot to prove after his poor England showing. He could hurt us. Hopefully i’m wrong.

    Did RVP’s Doctor say “It’s a bad tear Robin, but we won’t let it Defeutus?” 🙂

  24. Micky Did It 89

    Morning all,
    Is Rosicky fit for selection? If he is, what’s wrong, why isn’t he injured?
    As I said on here sunday, I’m pretty sure he will play Diaby up front. Yip, I’m serious!

  25. sven

    Arshavin has said he wants that central role, lets see what he’s got against Sunderland!

    Diaby won’t play so we will get to see a Fabregas/Song/Nasri midfield……can’t wait!

  26. Edmond Dantes

    Im getting a visit from an Italian abbot later. Hes the president of the IAWAS. That is, International Arsene Wenger Appreciation Society. So in Le Grove terms he would be the ultimate AKB. I have asked him to say a few words and he has agreed.

  27. Micky Did It 89

    Oh, and if Diaby plays up top, that would leave a convenient space in the middle for Eboue, with Song bringing up the rear. AW must be wetting himself. Marmite on toast.

  28. Sabeel Indian Gunner

    I am not sure about Diaby up front,because of his height,He is not a natural in things like jumping..

    he doesnt know to jump like verminator,the proof is his aweful defending at long balls inspite of his height,in addition to his own goals…

    Basically Diaby doesnot know to use his Height..so might not turn out a good idea…

    At same time,Eduardo would be gutted if not used as Centreforward,he would be thinking what the hell is he bought for,if the Best-finisher we have,doesnt play at his natural spot at even times like this…

  29. Micky Did It 89

    Rico: a marmite injured? You’re fucking kidding me! (no I dont like any of our players being injured, but!)

  30. Ryan L

    Adebayor – “Wenger forced me out”

    Yes, that is because you are a grade a cunt !!

    Hearing such actions dealt out by Wenger, must have elevated him to god like status with Ethan ? Or does Ethan not come on anymore ?

  31. Edmond Dantes

    Diaby would be a fish out of water playing up front. As it is, he looks out of place in midfield, I can’t imagine him playing upfront. The best place for Diaby would be the bench.

  32. ManGoonian

    Gooby;

    It happenes every International break. They are pathetic, using cesc as a means to try and out do each other; Barca vs Real…

    Cesc aint goin nowhere… Not for 3 or 4 years yet anyways…

    He would be daft to go to Real coz its a circus and he would be daft to go to barca and end up on the bench. Simple as really.

  33. Edmond Dantes

    Bendy is not too bad playing wide. But Eboue should only play at RB. For tactical reasons, however, he could play RM to provide more defensive cover, which AW often does.

  34. ManGoonian

    Its funny people goin on like bendy has been played on the right wing… It just isnt true. he’s played on the right of a front 3. hats hardly the same thing.

    He is a forward, a right footed one, soooo, playing there is hardly a massive jump for him…

  35. AngeAusArsenal

    Don’t know if Cesc reads blogs, but if I was him and I was reading that you had already replaced him with Ramsey then if i was him I’d say FFS what more do i have to do to prove my loyalty and then if they don’t believe me I might as well go.
    Doom and gloom as usual by the usual suspects

  36. Micky Did It 89

    ManG: on a serious note then. I know what you are saying, and actually I think Bendy will become a very good player, but I see him in the middle of a front three. I do think AW likes intended central strikers to do some time further wide.

  37. ManGoonian

    Reports in respected Spanish publication El Mundo Deportivo reveal that Real Madrid are set to sell six stars in the January transfer window. The six set for the exit door are Mahamadou Diarra, who has been linked with Arsenal,
    ____________________________

    I’d sign him…

  38. Arsenal Tom

    playing bendy on the right so it gives the keeper a good target to aim for, bendy is taller than probably every full back in the league so will win 90% of the headers and help keep possession

  39. Gooby

    AAA i disagree with you ; if cesc goes we sould replace him anyway.

    it is stupid to say that we don’t count on him, he is our best player, and if he is loyal he is going to stay(and i think he is) and he knows he is our best midfielder.

    but everyone knows here that ramsey could be his long term replacement. think a bit about it

  40. ManGoonian

    Those Ade quotes today ar from a magazine interview from a while back I am guessing. Still, they are hilarious and show him up to be the biggest liar and 2 faced c*nt since Cashley!

    If I was a Shitty fan, Id be well pissed off. The amount of times he mentions Arsenal, and not wanting to leave, yadda yadda…

    Plus the 2nd rate performances he’s been putting in of late…

    Hahaha…

  41. Edmond Dantes

    I hope Fabregas gives Arsenal at least 10 years before he leaves. That will mean he will be 26 if he then decides to go. Since hes been at Arsenal from the age of 16. But with the pressure coming in from Spain, that seems unlikely. Hopefully, Ramsey continues to develop rapidly and then he can fill that void that Cesc will leave.

  42. AngeAusArsenal

    I dont think Ramsey is as good as Cesc.But Gooby didn’t you say at 10.26 taht Cesc is going to barca at the end of the season? So which is it?stay or go?

  43. ManGoonian

    Edmondo;

    I think the pressure has been the same on Cesc for about 2/3 years now. If he can deal with it now, then there’s no reason he can’t continue to do so, IMO.

    Plus, he may get soooo pissed off with em, constantly using him as a prize for the different Presidents to win elections and shit, he might decide to stick around even longer…?

  44. Sabeel Indian Gunner

    Yes, Ramsey is Fabregas replacement,whenever Fabregas decides to leave us

    and probably we are on the road of discovery of finding someone to replace ramsey,when he decides to leave arsenal…

    this cycle will continue…and hopefully may stop if and only if we become again a ruthless consistent Trophy winners for few years….which is a serious doubt,looking at the amount of money being pumped in 4-5 clubs season in-season out

  45. Gooby

    can’t make up my mind, i’d like to belive he is staying. i have a bad feeling that he is leaving soon tho.
    pffff, fuck i don’t know we’ll see this summer.

    i would like them to pay 1,000,000£ for him

  46. Arsenal Tom

    id have thought if cesc was gonna go last year would have been far more likely than this, especially if we carry on as we have started. last year nobody could have begrudged him leaving after the shit we served up

  47. ManGoonian

    I think we are being way too premature about ramsey… He is a fantastic prospect, but is no way ready to step in and play week in, yet…

    He needs about 2 years, IMO. In which time, he will play more and more…

    During the CC game with Liverpool, he got noticeably tired and made quite a few bad and dangerous passes…

  48. Edmond Dantes

    MG

    I hope that will be the case and he gets pissed of with the constant speculation. But ever since Real have been splashing the cash, the transfer rumours and pressure has just intensified.

  49. Pedro

    Mang, I wouldn’t expect to see Rambo thrive in the holding role… but I don’t see why he couldn’t contribute in a Diaby style position.

    His fitness will improve as he plays more, I wouldn’t worry about that.

  50. KenyaGunner

    (Human) Placenta juice injection?
    Now that’s a new one…I wonder who volunteered their placenta juice for the Op, and wont the unborn child somehow be ‘related’ to RVP in this case?

    About cover up-front and positioning, we all know we have the players, so no need to state their names again…I just need to stress our that in our 4-3-3, the front 3 always inter-change positions several times during any match…so it does not matter who plays where…

    Does anyone remember the last time A Song came to the African Cup of Nations?…remember when he returned?…his form was bollox..I hope this does not happen again. (same happened to Kolo by the way)…

  51. SUGA3

    Lala,

    none of these you mentioned are likely to come to Arse in January and that is a fact – Sendy offers more in DM than Denilson IMO…

    played there in preseason and looked quite tidy…

  52. Edmond Dantes

    Its brilliant that we managed to get Ramsey instead of him going to the mancs. They were favourites at one stage according to all the manc-biased papers. AW put in a few personal touches to seal the deal. We now beginning to see the fruits bear from that transfer.

  53. bnsb

    Real Madrid Clear out:

    Others who are allegedly set to be offered to other clubs are Mahamadou Diarra, Fernando Gago, Ruud van Nistelrooy, Jerzy Dudek, Royston Drenthe and Christophe Metzelder.

  54. Edmond Dantes

    Similarly, Arsenal almost signed Ronaldo according to AW. Just see how he turned out. I think the Quieroz factor swung that one the mancs way. But its always nice to get one over them.

  55. Edmond Dantes

    I did promise to get the abbot to say a few words on Arsene. As soon as he comes in, I will give him the floor. You guys can ask him anything you like. Remember, he is the president of the IAWAS. He believes in AW with religious zeal as can be expected. He is called the Abbe Busoni.

  56. ArsenalKenya

    Croatian international forward Eduardo is confident he can fill Robin van Persie’s big boots after the Arsenal man’s ankle injury. Nicklas Bendtner also faces a lengthy period on the sidelines, which sees Eduardo likely to take an extended run in the first-team.

    “Against Tottenham I missed one big chance in particular, when I was one-on-one with the goalkeeper. Maybe I had too much time to think about what I had to do,” the 26-year-old Croatian said.

    “Sometimes it is better when you have less time to think and can act instinctively.

    “But I will not worry about that chance, I feel strong in my head and my body.

    “It is good that I was in the position to have the chance because, if you keep doing that, then the goals will come.”

  57. ikon

    Ramsey has it in him to be the maistay of our midfield for many years to come. The guy is the most complete midfielder, even better than Gerrard.

  58. rico

    I don’t think Cesc will go for a few years yet, if he does though, me thinks it will Be Merida who steps into his shoes…

    As long as Ivan sorts his new contact out!

  59. ManGoonian

    Pedro;

    Sure Ramsey can come in and play in eother of the 2 more attack minded central midfield roles, but not every game… yet!

    As ATom says, Nasri is another one who can come in and do that role too…

    But we have Cesc, Nasri, Rosicky, Wiloshie, Diaby, Ramsey who can all do the job, so we are well covered there…

  60. LadyGooner

    The News of the World has an interview with Argentine starlet Angel Di Maria, supposedly worth £36mil and wanted buy Chavs and Man Utd and Man Shitty. Di Maria says he was on the verge of joining Arsenal in 2007 but the deal fell through, apparently because we couldn’t stump up the cash. He said “I don’t know what exactly happened with the move. I was very excited to join them but it never happened. From what I’ve been told, the money that was supposed to appear never appeared. And just a day and a half later Benfica showed interest then hired me”…How the hell did we let this happen?! WTF!!

  61. ManGoonian

    ATom;

    Yeah, thats what I thought too. Some Gooner even made a fake Boca Juniors website with “quotes” from him and stories about the fans being pissed off he was leaving for Arsenal! Sick fucker!

  62. Edmond Dantes

    Guys, this is quite a treat for Le Grove. The Abbe’s comments are being moderated at the moment. But soon you will be able to take in the sweet nectar of the Abbe’s words.

  63. rico

    Liverpool’s Dutch international Dirk Kuyt has claimed that compatriot Robin van Persie was the subject of a bad challenge from Italian Giorgio Chiellini, despite the Arsenal striker admonishing his opponent of any blame for the ankle injury which he subsequently sustained. Arsene Wenger is set to be without his leading scorer for six weeks after it was confirmed the 26-year-old had suffered ligament damage.

    Speaking about the friendly encounter with Italy, Kuyt spoke openly about the disappointing tactics employed by the reigning World champions.

    “I was very disappointed,” Kuyt told Sky Sports News.

    “We played a friendly against a big country – Italy – and if you see the way they kicked us it’s very sad, very sad for the Dutch team and also very sad for Robin because he was in great form.

    “I think it was a bad tackle [Chiellini on van Persie] sometimes you think about this when you play a friendly for your country there should be more respect for each other and hopefully it won’t happen in the future.”

  64. Arsenal Tom

    Mangoon… great point mate!! if we’d have signed him 2 years ago people would be going mental about signing another kid when the likes of pires and co were being offloaded

  65. LadyGooner

    MANGOONIAN- Maybe you’re right, but the Di Maria puts it, sounds like a fee was agreed: “…the money that was supposed to appear didn’t appear”. If no fee was agreed, wouldn’t he have said “The clubs couldn’t reach an agreement”?

  66. Edmond Dantes

    A T

    I have an Italian abbot here with me who wants to say a few things on the Grove. He is a hardcore Arsenal fan. To be more specific, he is very devoted to Arsene.

  67. goonermichael

    I saw the ibterview with Kuyt Rico. He was well pissed off. He said the Italians kicked them all over the place.

  68. LadyGooner

    I do agree with you on the fact the fans wouldn’t have been happy with us signing another youngster. But we signed Ramsey in 2008, so…

  69. lester

    FYA Geoff/Pedro

    Assist Roll
    Cesc Fabregas 13
    Robin van Persie 7
    Aaron Ramsey 4
    Eduardo 4
    Andrey Arshavin 3
    Bacary Sagna 3
    Thomas Rosicky 3
    Alex Song 2
    Abou Diaby 2
    Emmanuel Eboue 2
    William Gallas 1
    Gael Clichy 1
    Thomas Vermaelen 1
    Denilson 1
    Nicklas Bendtner 1
    Carlos Vela 1
    Mark Randall 1

  70. Edmond Dantes

    A T

    This guy is the ultimate “AKB.” He even holds a weekly service praising AW. Have you guys not heard of IAWAS. Well, I guess not, because at the moment its a bit of an underground society.