Tchavski be the brew + full player ratings and match review

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As promised earlier, a match review from man in the back row, Bud!

Gents (& Ladies of course), what can one say about yesterdays game that Prince Pedro of of Le-Grove hasn’t already said?

You may think that is a stupid statement as he hasn’t really said anything about the game, but that’s just it, it was all a bit training ground. In no way am I criticising Arsenals performance, it was clean, it was clinical, its just

Newcastle are… well… errrr… crap !!!!

Anyway, will come to the game shortly. First of all, I would like to ask how/why, Blogger Geoff, owner of Ferrari’s, Astons and his own Chopper, managed to emerge from an off-license last night with 5 cans of Tchavski 6.3% proof polish lager (at 73p a tinny), when he was going in for a packet of hamlets and something for the weekend??? Strangely it was quite nice, even if the name was hard to swallow; and most satisfying to piss down a toilet like Abramovich’s money, and clearly, together with the 3 pints at half time, Tchavski played its part in

Geoff’s spacial awareness issues!

Right, so here goes, I think all I can give you is an honest if somewhat drunken player rating on last nights game:

Almunia – Rumour has it that he got as high up as row V signing signatures during the 2nd half, such was his burning desire to do something yesterday………. One of his more comfortable evenings. 7

Sagna – As strange as this may sound, especially as he is my favourite player this year; whilst Sagna was faultless (again!), I thought young Hoyte was more penetrating on Saturday. 7

Clichy – He’s got Ashley’s position, now he wants his wife. Rumour has it also, that if France don’t pick him soon, he’s going to take English nationality and take Cuntley’s England spot too. Awesome as always. 8

Gallas – Well, he is the man. Captain Fantastic was (I know this is starting to sound boring, but as I say, it was an odd training game kind of spectacle) solid, had Owen in his pocket and generally had a trouble free evening. Good distribution, nice hair. 7

Senderos – Big Phil… well what can I say? 3 clean sheets on the trot. 9 for – 0 against and its all down to you buddy. Work on that distribution and other people apart from me and Pedro might start liking you again. Solid, comfortable and didn’t leave me with my stomach coming out of my mouth every time he had the ball. The tide is turning Big Man. 7

Diaby – Strangely looked better on the highlights that I watched this morning than he did last night, not that he looked bad, but just didn’t stand out for me. He did OK, but gonna give him a seven for a cracking shot with his left foot, which according to Le-Grove Optic stats was the first ever time he’s touched a ball with his left, so well deserved. 7

Fabregas – Still not back to his best, but that was still better than anything he was up against last night. It just seems that final ball he plays at the moment is just not getting through like it did at the beginning of the season. Good goal though, although, was it a slice? Fab, any chance you could post a comment to confirm this point? 7

Flamini – More Fabulous than Fabregas again last night. An overall impressive, energetic stand out performance and well deserving of the Le-Grove Man of the Match Bottle of Warnicks Advocaat. What about that cross for Ade’s goal, and what about that hum-dinger rocket of a goal! C’est Magnifique! 9

Hleb – Not really at the races last night. Was still better than anyone in black and white, but if I was writing his school report, I’d have to say, “Can do better”. Come on you little twisty turny sticky thing, we need King Alex back firing! 6

Eduardo – At some point, we are going to have to stop saying he is going to be one hell of a player when it clicks for him, but in the meantime, he is going to be one hell of a player when it clicks for him. Ran his little legs off and overall, put in a lot of work for the team. 7

Adebayor – Good goal AGAIN. And worked hard off the ball, which in the past had been a criticism aimed at him. At 11ft 7inches, the man is a giant and with each game he is growing. 8


Bendtner – Looked lively when he come on and a nice set up for Fabs goal. Also, went head to head again with Ade, but in celebration this time. 7

Gilberto – I thought he looked younger and more spritely last night when he came on, but Newcastle were shit, but I’m going to give him the benefit of the doubt. 7

Walcott – Not on long enough to produce his dazzling array of skills and trickery. Oops sorry, wrong player! Seriously, made some great runs, but still as nervous as a Cashley on a Sunday morning! 6

Le Grove would like the thank Bud for that stellar review!

30 Responses to “Tchavski be the brew + full player ratings and match review”

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  1. Francesc Fabregas

    Yes, it was indeed a slice, but a deliberate one. A player of my outstanding vision realises when a slice will help to fool the ‘keeper.

    I know I am also a bit ordinary at the mo too, but I’m waiting for the United games where I will score 5 goals, in each. Don’t want to alert them to my talent do I.

  2. Cesc Fabregas

    ei! Gringo!

    Get out my name puta, yo soy el verdadero Fabregas!

    How dare you says ees eslice, only i may say eet.

    Imposters. Bastardos.

  3. Pedro

    Cesc and Arsene, if you don’t have anything English to say, go and blog somewhere else?

    Shouldn’t you guys be at training or something?

    Great blog bud!


  4. Bud

    I’ve just read my post again and noted that Prince Pedro, the master of Political Correctness has expertly dubbed a few comments for legal reasons…… Blogger Geoff & Prince Pedro do not get the credit they deserve as its bloody hard to write a post that is funny and fresh and that does not cross the lines of what is acceptable and still pricks like that Sam on Pedros earlier post complain…….. fucking knobhead !!!!

  5. Pedro

    Spanish Fry is Le Groves new Blog roll buddy (Arsenalfcblog), he likes the Flamster more than you like Tchavski Bud!

  6. Gunnersaurus

    Good blogging bud, a good solid match review!

    I’ve never had a Tchavski before, I have a few of them hanging around outside my local offy from time to time!

    Who’s up next? Oh yeah, Citeh!

  7. Bud

    I can’tr wait till they bring it out in draght form….. very much looking forward to nipping down my local to knock back a few Tchavskis !!!!!

  8. Mike (the neighbour)

    Bud whats this shame thing -I thought the review was fab -to the point/ no Bullshit tinges of humour and even appealing to the more sensitive reader -no swearing !
    If Mrs Bud cant get the button try Mrs Geoff I am sure she has a jar full of expensive buttons that have come off some of geoffs designer coats that have been worn to celebrity charity do´s once and have come back with bullet holes / knife cuts / and blood stains on them

  9. Bud

    Booooooooooooooooo !!!!!!!!

    Speaking to Arsenal TV Online on Tuesday night, the Frenchman (Wenger) seemed content with what he says will be his only acquisition (Freeman) during the transfer window.

  10. Steve

    Not enough swearing for my liking Bud.

    You could have said that Sagna had that ugly cunt Duff in his pocket.

    Top review.

  11. Bud

    Ahhhhhh, but Prince Pedro had the PC Police on his case all day, and obviously on my debut I was steering clear of any critisism, especially from those Anti-Swearing PC CUNTS !!!!!!!

    Real reason, I am trying very very hard for the sake of my son who is now picking up words……. in exchange for sexual favours from Mrs Bud of course !!!!!!!

  12. Odub

    Bud I would like to take this oppourtunity to commend you on your sojourn into the world of internet blog posting.. I have to say I found your piece rather coincise, and devoid of the utterly crass and filthy language we have come to associate with Le Grove(and love I might add)…. We’ll let you off this time!!

    Apart from that job well done, and I hope this puts an end to your fucking whining!!!

  13. casicky

    Good blog,sendman played well yday still not sure his up for it yet though but i do have to state i am a bit biased at the moment he hasnt impresst me like i know he can so still dissapointed

    Apart from that quietly happy,only fear that Gilberto didnt look at all young for me he doesnt loo even close to being Flamsters understudy

  14. Bud

    AHhhhh, but he did look better than last week……. therefore, we have an improvement !

    In fairness, there wasn’t much room down there for his performances to get worse, but lets all not beat the guy up, he WAS great for us, but is struggling at the moment. That saying, Bekham last season at Real is a case in point. Was shit, dropped and then bought back for the run in and in no small part helped them win the league !!!!

    Good players don’t just become shit over night, they just lose form and most of the time form is temporary anyway !!!!!

  15. Geoff

    There’s nothing wrong with Polish beer! bit late today I’ve been playing golf, but great post bud and I agree with all your player scores, top blogging!

  16. Rob From Oz

    Is Geoff seriously a rich cunt? and own ferraris n shit? if so ure a pimp……..!! anyway this is seriously an awesome site!

  17. Geoff

    Rob I’m not seriously rich, they’re all having a pop, and the closest I’ve been to a Ferrari is this comment, I am however a pimp!