Arsenal beat the Chavs – Cashley beaten in best left back comp – Fat Frank beats kids

by & filed under Uncategorized.

Finally, the lady is off to sleep and I can post! The worry is, what do I do if she wakes up? Tell her I have snuk out of bed to post a match report…? How weird would that sound? No, I’ll just tell her I was looking at porn. I want her to be dissappointed in a good way.

So how about that chaps and chapesses? What a result! What a game! What a fight!

As usual, I’m not going to post a full match review… I’m not skilled enough journalistically to do that, what I will do is give you a piece of my mind!

Firstly, the starting line up was exactly what we had been praying for. Hleb, Cesc and the Flamster all back in the starting line up. When I arrived in the stadium I could feel the buzz, everyone was excited as they knew we had an excellent chance of turning over a Chavski team which was missing Drogba, Essien and that Portuguese chap who plays centre back. Many Gooners were also excited that Ashley Cole was playing! I noticed quite a few fans franticly blowing up rubber mobile phones! Well played to you guys!

I sat with a Chavski fan, we spoke in depth before the game about the pro’s and cons of each team. The Chavski fan told me that they are playing much in the same way as they had under Mourinho, except players like Joe Cole had been given more creative licence. We also decided that Petr Cech was the best Keeper in the world and that if there was any weakness in the AFC team, it was Almunia (And Eboue). I was confident of a 2-0 victory, he said he would be contented with a draw.

The game kicked off and we were pretty dominant, the difference Flamini made was noticable… he was everywhere. Cesc was looking quite commanding and Adebayor had his touch back. The first half passed without to much to talk about. Clichy had the wee man in his pocket the whole half bar a deflected shot which Almunia caught well. Shevfatso shot powerfully from 20 yards, Almuna parried poorly but we got away with it. According to my TV watching chum, the ball swerved violently… whatever… I shit myself.

Terry got chopped down by Eboue and went off. Bonus, about time he started earning his cash.

Towards the end of the half, Cech duffed a clearance, Arsenal took possession and Rosicky ran at goal… then delivered poorly, we won a corner. I said to the guy sitting next to me,’Teams like Chelsea only make 2 mistakes in a game and you have to capitalise… we just failed to capitalise’. Cesc whipped in the corner… Cech comes out flapping… MISSES… Willy G nods it in to put us one up! WOOO HOOO! We went nuts! Most people my end of the stadium weren’t even sure it went in! I said to the guy next to me, ‘Thats there second mistake!’, oh how we chortled.

The Half time talk was about the good performance, a disliking for Eboue and his ineffective play and also about Big Al’s flap.

Second half starts and Chavski mean business. They spread the ball around a lot better than in the first half and cause us many more problems. Kalou came on and looked very dangerous, Mikel (The filthy cunt) had a few shots, forcing Big Al into a fantastic save. Wright-Phillips shot accross goal from an acute angle which frightened us. Then he missed an open goal from 6 yards, proving family comes first! SEANY WRIGHT WRIGHT WRIGHT!

Arsenal had their fair share of chances! After Eboue was scythed down, Rv to the P came on and looked menaceing… he missed a sitter from 8 yards, powering it over the bar, then he had a goal disallowed because Rosicky was offside. Ade then had a goal disallowed for fouling the dire Ben Tal Haim. The last notable chance was Shevfatso’s freekick, which was rifled at him, great save Al… I knew you were the best!

The game fittingly finished 1.24 seconds early (Yeah, I was timing the injury time) when Cesc chopped Cashley down… Cole bitch slapped Cesc… Cesc pulled an ‘Eboue’ and stayed down… Ref blows up!

VICTORY WAS OURS!

So a few points to make about the game.

Did anyone see Fat Frank Lampard shove the ball boy? Thats why no one likes you Frank, you beat kids… you’re a real piece of work. At least Kolo ran half the pitch to give you a bollocking.

Almunia was fantastic. He made some important saves and held the ball well all game. My favourite save was the one that was a cross fizzed in at about 100mph, a Chav player missed it but Big Al kept his eye on it and caught it. Well played sir, you were great.

Ashley Cole hated teh abuse he recieved. He did his best to incite the crowd with some petulant behaviour, but you could tell he was gutted. The funny thing about the abuse is the crowd got bored of it after a while. Our football is too fantastic to worry about that poxy cunt. What made matters worse for Ashley is firstly, Ade chopped him down with a horrror challenge, secondly, Clichy got the man of the match award and looks the better player and thirdly, your make weight for the worst deal in history scored the winner!

The ref was rubbish. His decision making was all over the place and in the second half, it felt like he had been paid off… Shocking reffing. Was I the only Arsenal fan thinking that we were all going to be talking about the disallowed goals costing us 2 points today?

Good job we held on I say!

So 3 points in the bag for us and the Arsenal title challenge rolls on!

Bring on Scum!

Small matter of Blackburn in the Carling cup first!

Happy Sunday evening Grovers!

9 Responses to “Arsenal beat the Chavs – Cashley beaten in best left back comp – Fat Frank beats kids”

Jump to comment form ↓

  1. *_Respects Highbury

    Ca$hley is a cunt. At least Eboue seems to have done something positive for the first time in a long time, when he went throug ‘man of steel’ John Terry. The snarling chav deserved everything he got, and as for Ca$hley it is true to say he detested the abuse he got. Couldn’t hack it. We need to be thankful to Ca$hley and to the chavs though: a) We got ourselves a fabulous new captain who has scored critical goals in our 2 biggest matches of the season b) We now have the best left-back in the league c) Chavski paid us for a virus.

    I was surprised to hear Fat Frank Lampard mentioned in the match report though – was he playing?

  2. Lowy

    I was worrying about the disallowed goals as well. Especially Adebayor’s chance as that should have definitely been a goal

  3. Alex

    Must say that, though I’m a Newcastle fan, I did very much enjoy the match where Arsenal won Chelsea. Must say hats off to the lads! Beat Man U I say!

  4. jimmyfingers

    Excellent result. The night after the game is a complete blur: trying to remember how I got home. Not managing to.

    Didn’t score that second or even third goal our performance deserved but we got the points. Eboue went from zero to hero when he injured Terry, then did the same trick on himself which we liked.

  5. str8goon

    Ohh did anyone see Clichy yeserday!? Ashley who!!!?? Gael obviously out shined and out performed Ashley in anyones book. Well except if you count all the times Cole was caught crying and bitching, he looked like a mad bobble head. But I digress, Clichy has stepped out of Cole’s shadow and is now truly entering into his own limelight. It’s only a matter of time before he gets the recognition he deserves and place he deserves with the French National team. Move over Abidal. No chance Evra. Clichy is the name.