Reading stories about Joel Campbell always transports me back to an 1850s novel about an orphaned child that’s bounced pillar to post, never really quite fitting in anywhere.
I really don’t think he’s as bad as the list of clubs he’s played for suggest. He’s not very cultured, sure, but he’s a hard worker and exactly the sort of player you see lining up for West Ham week in week out. Can’t believe he’s being shipped back to Greece. A very sad story, some might say… a tragedy.
Another story that’s frustratingly bubbling along, like a shaken bottle off Lucozade on a summers day (have you ever picked up a bottle that isn’t sticky?), is the one about Alex THE OX Chambermaid. He’s apparently very upset we’re not offering him a new deal. I have no idea why we’re reneging here, Alfred worked out he’d played 8 or so positions this season, culminating in him bossing the wing back role Kieran Gibbs had fannied out of. What’s not to love about the Ox? Explosive power, brilliant pace over 20 meters, good range of passing and a terrific attitude. Also, his Snapchat game is another level.
You know another player we dithered on contract wise? Serge Gnabry. Now, not saying he’s going to be a superstar, but waiting until after the Olympics to sign him was STUPID. Easily looked more interesting at 18 than Theo or The Ox did at the same time.
Another day, another Sanchez rumbling. Bayern Munich are fearful he’s using their interest to drive a move to Manchester City, poor darlings. They don’t want to pay his mega wages, which isn’t surprising… but City will, which isn’t surprising. What does make me laugh is all that nonsense about how we might not be able to offer pay rises this summer… but no one talking about City dropping £300k a weeks left, right, and centre.
Interesting news around CR7 being upset because he’s being done for tax evasion… can’t quite understand how that’s Madrid’s fault, but what does get me is it seems that part of the deal with superstars moving to Barca and Madrid is the club are willing to go WAY above and beyond to secure the names. You only have to look at the Neymar story to see that.
Anyway, why the hell any club would pay £180m for a 31-year-old is beyond me. Is he going to recoup that value for you in advertising? Is he going to continue you to be machine at that age? I mean, he really is a freak of nature, but when you’re dropping more money than the whole Premier League paycheck (£150m for the best), you really are heading into the twilight zone of football!
Finally, Arsenal are adding a new performance director to their backroom team. Looking to hire Darren Burgess from PORT Adelaide who play some really feminine game called AFL. I have no idea what the purpose of this move is. We seem to have a pretty solid fitness setup, overseen by World Cup winner Shad F. So it’ll be interesting to read what the intent of this hire is, especially as this area doesn’t have anywhere near the weaknesses of others (coaching, scouting, keeping). Watch this space.
See you later. Gonna drop a podcast for you this week I believe.